10 JUNE 2000, Page 56

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CHESS

The Ultimate lslav Malt. www.ardbeg.com David Spanier

Raymond Keene

THIS week's article is a tribute to David Spanier who died last month. David was an enthusiastic poker player, an avid chess- player and on several occasions stood in to write this column for me while I was playing in tournaments abroad. As well as being a former diplomatic correspondent of the Times, he also found time to write books on chess and poker, the most notable of which was called Total Chess. In fact, there was very little chess in it. Most of it consisted of anecdote and speculation in the style which made David's writings so accessible and attractive to the non-expert. What follows this week is taken from Total Chess.

Why do you play so badly? Sorry, I'll rephrase that. Why do I play so badly? It's a question which revolves in my thoughts from time to time, usually as I drive back to work after losing another series of five- minute games at the chess café where I pass an hour or two, or three, most days. Originally the café was set up in Hampstead, a large, bare working-class café serving mugs of tea and eggs on toast, with wide, plate-glass windows, through which passers-by could watch the chessplayers. The same crew of players and kibitzers turned out every day, morning, noon and night; and in their various quirks and eccen- tricities, arising from their addiction to chess, they no doubt resembled every other chess café in Vienna, Paris or New York.

Ah, Vienna! At the peak of their popular- ity, before the second world war, the city had some 4,000 coffee houses. Even today there are 400, almost half of them within the Ringstrasse, the inner city. Those were the days when Vienna, with its cosmopolitan style, its taste for talk and fascination with diplomacy, and its substantial Jewish com- munity, was the hub of Central Europe. `The origins of the very first café,' noted a recent tribute to Das Wiener Kaffeehaus as one of Europe's most civilised institutions, `can be traced precisely to 1683, when Vienna lay under siege from the Turks . . . a certain Herr Kolschitsky, a coffee merchant by trade, was helping the Austrians to achieve victory in a more subtle way. Disguised as a pasha he traded among the Turkish camps, taking detailed notes of their positions and numbers.' When the siege was raised the Habsburgs did not forget their brave spy. A licence was granted to establish a coffee-house. Kolschitsky's `Kaffee- Schrank' proved addictive.

In Vienna, and to a lesser extent Budapest, Prague and Trieste, the café still plays the role of office, library and club, a meeting place for students, artists, business- men and, of course, 'revolutionaries'. According to this account by Richard Bassett in the Times, it was in the Central Café, in 1913, that a certain Herr Bronstein would regularly take coffee and play chess. 'A harmless activity, the Viennese secret police observed, even if Bronstein's real name was Trotsky and his chess partner better known as Stalin.' As for left-wing legend, there is no record whatever of Stalin playing Trotsky at chess. (But there is the delightful one-liner from a habitué of one of New York's Lower East Side chess clubs: 'Trotsky? Hramnif I could give him knight odds.')

It is surely possible to improve one's game by a little application. I mean, one can't improve at tennis without coaching or at the piano without a music teacher. The inherent difficulty with chess is that one knows already what one should do, how to play correctly, at least in a macro sense, so what is really required is not so much a trainer as self-analysis. Perhaps a behavioural psychol- ogist might provide the remedy: 'Attach this wire to your right hand, and wind it up your sleeve to the back of your head. Now every time you leave a piece en prise, you will receive a small electric shock, gradually increasing in intensity until . . . aaaagghh!' Or psychoanalysis? 'Doctor, I have this over- whelming compulsion to sacrifice, I just can't help it, every time I play I throw away the queen!' Hmm . . . why don't you tell me about your mother?'

The proceeds from this article will be donated to David's favourite charity. Those also wishing to support this should send donations to the Great Ormond Street Children's Hospital Fundraising Department, 40/41 Queen Square, London WC2 N3AJ, with a covering note 'In mem- ory of David and Jessica Spanier'.

Ardbeg Malt Whisky Puzzle No. 32 White to play and win — first move only required. This puzzle is taken from Total Chess. White to play and mate in two moves.

Answers to me at The Spectator by Tuesday 13 June or via e-mail to vanessa@spectator.co.uk or by fax on 020 7242 0603. The winner will be the first cor- rect answer drawn out of a hat, and each week I shall be offering a prize of a bottle of Ardbeg Malt Whisky.

Last week's solution: ... Qa2+ Last week's winner: Mike Evans, Dyfed.