10 MARCH 1894, Page 16

THE ETHICS * OF FLIRTATION.

rro THE EDITOR OF THE "SPECTATOR."]

your article in the Spectator of February 24th on "The Ethics of Flirtation," you lay it down that a woman may flirt with a dozen men if she likes, while a man may flirt with only one woman at a time. I fail to see the reason for making any such distinction. Flirtation has been well defined as "attentions without intentions ; " and it is a harmless, pretty game when played fairly,—otherwise, it is cruel sport, and as heartless in one sex as in the other. To my mind, the essence of flirtation is, that the " attentions " should be paid to a number, and not lavished on one ; for then the game degenerates into serious love-making, and if played without intentions, then into dishonourable love- making. If a man confines his "attentions without inten- tions " to one woman, she will naturally become "inspired with a belief in his single-hearted devotion," and possibly love him, to her lasting sorrow. If, on the other hand, a man flirts with a dozen dear friends, as a woman may, why then. ' his energies are diffused and dispersed in harmless vapourings, and no one is any the worse. Again, if a woman leads any of her admirers to "believe in her single-hearted devotion" when she does not mean it, then she is just as bad as the- man in a like case.

But you may say that love-making is confined to one sex, and that therefore there is a distinction after all. Is it ? Do. women never make love ? There is a subtle process known to the sex as "leading him on," which is the counterpart a male courting, and not to be distinguished from it. I deny- that a woman has any rights of property in the dozen or more men she may flirt with ; and considering that there are not enough men to go round as it is, I think that any other- woman has a perfect right to lure off any of the dozen, if she can. After all, flirtation is only the effort to please the- opposite sex, either in man or woman,—innocent if pursued. openly and above-board, guilty if carried to the point of mis- leading the other party; and equally innocent or guilty in either sex, without distinction.—I am, Sir, &c.,

FLIRTATION.