Heads in the sand
I TURN to the Business Opportunities page of the morning paper and see five opportu- nities for investing in ostriches. This is down from seven the week before, which may have something to do with the Department of Trade and Industry's decision to shut the Ostrich Farming Corporation down. Sure- fire schemes for investing in ostriches have until now been the fad of the moment dizzying returns in prospect, so the ads sug- gest: cheques rolling in to pay the school fees, and no effort needed. Just like Lloyd's of London with tail-feathers. Next we shall be told that ostriches, although stupid, are sane, so that you cannot get mad ostrich dis- ease if you eat them. My advice remains as it was two months ago: 'If you are tempted to buy an ostrich, put your head in the sand until the feeling goes away.' Someone at the DTI seems to agree.
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