13 FEBRUARY 1909, Page 16




[The story related below is quite authentic, and was told to the writes by one of those fortunate enough to be present on the occasion. We do not guarantee the verbal accuracy of the speech which the dist1nguisbed visitor was beguiled into making. And, there was no hoer. In other respects the original authority has been closely followed.] LORD JAN, he was a noble lord,

A landlord of the West Country.

He zaid, and swore by his levee sword, The Polly coal mine he'd go and zee.

Vor be had mines, both coal and lead, On Mendip and on Dartymoor.

One hunderd miles his lands they spread, Though he were shart o' viva vest your.

And he would view' the Polly mine:- Zo they &weed un up in an old vlour sack ! Athirt his buzzum was "J. K. Line," And " Zecond Quality" wrote on his back.

The look o' the shaft nigh turned un queer; Zays he : " This venture's overbold I Though my will is made and My conscience clear, I do hope as thack timer rope will hold!

And the man atop, and the man below,

Be.they zober men, with varablies too?

I baint afeared for myself, ye know ;

But if I were squat, what'd England do P Touch the House o' Peers, and you touch the Crown- " Look well to the pulley, I do beseech"— And be 'ould a said more; but the cage went down, And cut un off in the vlower of his speech.

Now, when the miners did espy • Him going down so bold and brave, Vlinging their colliers' caps on high Three hearty h'ringun' cheers they gave.

And to let their pleasure and loyal pride

Be known to all the country, round, Zome thoughtless ninnyhammer cried

The buzzing 'Hooter for to sound.

Vor thicoy be the barn they use The colliers to their work to call ; Likewise, a servos to spread the news When gas do bust or timbers fall.

Toohoo! Booboo you brazen throat Did rouse the yolk in cot and warm. 'Tarn! Saba! the ungodly note Through all the village zent the alarm.

"Ab, dear!" zap they: " tes a 'splosion, sure! And our poor chaps be slarteyed dead!" The vimmale yolk vlung out o' door, Each wrapped her skirt about her head.

And up the road in a weeping crowd Women and little childern came. The childern was chihiking loud: Their mothers, they was doin' the zame.

They reached the mine, they crossed the track,

They swarmed upon the coaly ground : Just as the cage came rattling back

Wi's hardship in it, zafe and sound.

Zafo and sound; but a trifle skeered,.

And glad to zee the light once more.' Of Old Nick's realm full oft he'd heerd,

But never been zo nigh before.

Zo, when a saw that anxious crowd,

And'beerd the babbies beal and cry— "Thanks, my good friends," zaid he, and bowed, " Vor this here ready zympatby.

But let your vlutterire hearts be glad Unhurt I am, though zummat zoiled; Tor years a keen desire I've had To zee where my poor tenants toiled.

While peers moll glorious tasks vulfil The mass will do their honest part : The Leopard Flag is vloating still, And England's zons are zound at heart.

Yet, zince I should be truly loath To give you worthy creatures pain, I hereby take my zoletnn oath

I never will go down again.

And in your voreman's hands I leave (Here came another h'ringun' cheer) Ten pounds, that each man may receive His choice of cider or of beer."

Zo said, zo done; the drink was shared A-standing in a joyous ring. And all the vimmale yolk declared Lord Jan did ought to be a King.

But Lords or Commons, Kings or Queens, This here's the moral of my song : The best of us are Human Beim; Whoy I myself be zometimes wrong I EDWARD SYDNEY TYLEE.