Q. I belong to a small reading group in the
village in which I live and have always enjoyed our meetings. Recently, however, one member of the group took it upon herself to invite a new neighbour to join us. We wanted to be welcoming and so said nothing; unfortunately, however, the newcomer has rather too much to say for herself, none of it worth listening to. She is also entirely lacking in self-awareness and so, despite increasingly obvious hints, does not realise just how much we resent her raucous tones and attention-seeking. She also likes rotten books and drives a Footballers’ Wives’ car. This woman has spoiled the group’s atmosphere and several of us are now wondering whether to bother to attend the next meeting. What should we do?
J.A., Hertfordshire A. Like society, reading groups need structure and discipline. It seems you did not have a chairperson to steer the incomer towards a behaviour more in keeping with the atmosphere of your group. In order not to hurt her feelings or make her feel that she is the victim of snobbery, why not announce at the beginning of your next meeting that, sadly, this will be the final meeting of the Hertfordshire Reading Group and invite those present to give a warm round of applause to everyone who made it such a success? Then quietly set up the Hertfordshire Philosophy Group. Invite all those members whose compatibility with one another is already established to become members. ‘The title is misleading,’ you can explain. ‘We will still be discussing books but just in a more philosophical way.’
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