17 JULY 1915, Page 15

LONGS AND SHORTS.

[To TIM EDITOR OF TEE "SPECTATOR:1 Silt,—Here is a " long " and a " short " of the "fifties" which may awaken the memory of your senior readers :— Original. Long Version. "If I'd a jackass as wouldn't "If I owned a donkey not given

go, to speed

D'ye think I'd wallop him? Do you think I would chastise

No, no, no ! him P No, indeed ;

I'd give him a carrot and I would offer him a carrot,

say Gee-ho, and say Proceed,

Geo-ho, Noddy.' " Proceed, Edward.'"