Q. I would be quite happy never to go out
to dinner again — especially now the summer nights are lengthening — but my wife works from home and always wants to accept invitations since she sees no one all day. I would not mind if the dinner parties we went to were not so formal, but in this neck of the woods they tend to be, and I dread sitting upright at a table for hours at a time. Often the woman who has given the dinner party tends to relax at the end of it and forget all about the coffee which, of course, is the cue for everyone to move to softer seating and from there it is easier to escape to home. Is there a way in which one can remind a hostess that it is time for coffee without appearing to be bossy or a control freak?
Name withheld, West Lothian A. When you arrive at these dinner parties tell your hostess that you really admire her for having had the energy to give it and you absolutely insist on doing something to help. She will invariably reply, ‘It’s all done, just relax and enjoy yourself.’ To which you can reply, ‘No. I insist. I’ll tell you what. I’ll be in charge of making the coffee at the end, how about that? That means you can relax after pudding.’ She will not only be grateful to you but is unlikely to suspect your motive.
Previous page
