No. 482: The winners
Competitors were asked to compose an octet on one of The following subjects: a New Year resolution, Twiggy takes the veil or an ad- vertisement for a tranquilliser.
The first octet drew an enthusiastic response, and plainly Twiggy-mania had not a little to do with it. Allowing competitors another two lines in which to stretch their talents did some- thing for the quality as well as for the quantity of the entries, despite the added difficulty of having to use all the given rhymes. A lot of competitors spoiled other- wise excellent entries by trying to- stick to rhyming couplets—certainly the rules called for no such rigid scheme and a good many 'nuns-in-the-sun' might more properly have found themselves in cloistered cells but for the unnecessary propinquity of the rhyme-words. Even 'Mother Superior' Graham Cherry, whose rather rough matutinal address to novice Twiggy wins five guineas, should be saying a few Ayes for his gratuitious fifth line: Come, novice, show a matchstick-leg, awake— It's time to model habits more divine.
. Lord! even Giacometti could not make
So very-nearly-nothing of a nun, Flashing her mini-shadow to the sun! —No fasts for you: your penance at the shrine Will be absorption, in tranquillity, Of carbohydrates—everlastingly!
W. A. Payne's epithalamion, for which he gets three guineas, strikes a slightly more solemn note—the opening lines, perhaps, for a projected 'Twiggy to Villeneuve': Slim Twiggy, worshipper at Fashion's Shrine, Has knelt before an altar more Divine, And she who loved Publicity's bright sun Has veiled her face in habit of a nun; Her body dormant, but her Soul awake, Prepares her final solemn vows to make, Wherein she chooses with tranquillity To model one dress—everlastingly.
There were several admirable New Year resolutions, including a rather salacious one from Tony Robinson and a de profundis from a hung-over Robert Allan; but the remaining three guineas go to J. B. Goudge for his tran- quilliser ad:
Seek you the cloistered quiet of a nun Whose pious heart o'erflows with peace divine? Would you relax beneath the soothing sun And, carefree, worship at Apollo's shrine? Cast off at once and everlastingly The load that chafes you, sleeping and awake. You'll find heart's ease and sweet tranquillity If you this tablet of contentment take.
The rhymes were from Wordsworth's sonnet Evening on Calais Beach' and this week the guinea for identifying the source goes to M. Wollman.
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