19 MAY 1990, Page 54

Television

Regular temptations

Wendy Cope

hat do we want?'

`Revolution!'

`When do we want it?'

`After Neighbours has finished and be- fore Inspector Morse!' That exchange, which made me laugh, is from The British Revolution', a sketch 10 Sunday's Spitting Image (ITV, 10.05 p.r11). As the credits rolled, my telephone rang and the caller announced that he'd finally got bored with Spitting Image after all these years, wasn't that sad? To me It seemed about the same — some very funny bits, some mildly funny bits, and a few jokes about toilets and bottoms, suitable only for nine-year-old boys of all ages. Mind you, I haven't been a regular viewer of Spitting Image in the last few years. As I've said before, I try to avoid being a regular viewer of more than one programme per week. Having missed two weeks of Coronation Street (ITV) while I was on holiday, I find that there is now no pressing need to switch it on. Now and again, I glean some information about Deirdre's love-life from the newspaper 0,1' TV Times and I'm confident that it won t be long before I lose interest altogether. It's just as well, in view of the fact that LA Law (ITV, 9 p.m., Thursday) is now back, and thirtysomething (Channel 4, 9 p.m., Saturday) is still running. The latter isn't unmissable — in fact I forgot to tape the famous episode in which Nancy finds out she has cancer — but I don't often miss it. Though the programme isn't supposed to be doing too well on this side of the Atlantic, it seems to be getting more Popular among the people I mix with. It comes up in conversation: `You know how Eliot was in last night's thirtysomething?' someone said to me on Saturday. 'All kind of manic because he couldn't deal with Nancy being ill. Well, he reminded me of X.' This was a man talking, incidentally. I've come across three men now who habitually sit down and watch couples discussing their rela- tionships and working things out. It's a hopeful sign but it has to be weighed against the much larger number who leave the room while their womenfolk watch the programme because they just can't stand it.

What I can't stand in thirtysomething are the dream and fantasy sequences, which spoil about one instalment in three. In last week's Up the Garden Path (ITV, 8 p.m., Wednesday), there was rather a good fantasy sequence, wherein Izzy's friends and colleagues mourned her untimely de- mise and testified to the heroism she'd displayed during the school fire that killed her. In reality the fire practice had caused Izzy to behave like the corporal in Dad's Army, screaming 'Don't panic!' to a room- ful of perfectly calm pupils. It's a pity I gave in to the urge to watch the program- me a second time. Episode two was better than episode one and I'm going to want to see the rest.

And there's something on Friday even- lags, too, that could be a regular tempta- tion. I chanced on South of the Border (BBC 1, 9.30 p.m.) towards the end of its previous series and liked it enough to hope for another. It stars Buki Armstrong and Rosie Powell as two young detectives. The border in question is the River Thames, so South Londoners may enjoy playing spot- the-location as they view. For the benefit of those of you who get The Spectator before Saturday, I should mention that this week's edition is the second half of a two-parter. If you want to find time for a revolution or anything, you may as well give it a miss.