DOMESTIC SERVICE.
(To THE EDITOR Or THE " SPECTATOR.")
SIR,—The correspondent " E. B." of your issue of September 7th seems to me to have a remarkable insight into the difficulties and the solution of the domestic servant problem. Acting on the prin- ciple that " he only is fit to rule who first learns to serve," some years ago I voluntarily undertook my nurse's duties, and for several months did her work unaided, with the result that I now have an excellent nurse for my children who has been with me for the past three years, and who I firmly believe is likely to remain with us. She knows that I can understand and sympathize with her diffi- culties, and that my advice is worth having, since it comes from one who has had practical experience. But I may mention that before employing her I ascertained that she bore an excellent character, and had given great satisfaction in her previous situation. I would rather step into the breach myself any time than rush to take the first girl who offers herself, regardless as is whether she brings a good reference or not. Realizing that this winter will be a very difficult one as regards fuel and lighting, for some weeks recently I undertook the 000king and stoking. I have now an excellent cook, and feel able to deal with her wisely and sympathetically during the trying months which lie before us. Tout comprendre est tout pardonner is a maxim which is worth following. But the sympathy and understanding should not be on one side only if a household is to be happily conducted. The maid, too, must study and consider her mistress; there must be give-and- take on both sides. But if the mistress sets the example the maids are usually quick to follow. Provided the mistress has wisdom and tactful firmness, the result will be a happy Oar. Foolish pandering to the unreasonable demands of an indifferent maid is quite a different matter: The mistress who has bad practical experience el household work soon learns how to discriminate between the maid who is worth keeping and the one who is not. Nagging never pays, but plain speaking occasionally, if tempered with kindness and justice, usually achieves success. One besetting fault most maids (in common with most mistresses) usually possess—a fault which has to be more or less condoned. The sensible mistress learns when to turn the blind eye; being imperfect herself, she does not expect perfection. When the shortage of necessaries first began to make itself felt I periodically asked my maids in turn to do an after- noon's shopping for me. I gave them a good sum of money, and asked them to procure as many of the necessaries of which we were short as possible. The result was most satisfactory. Having experienced the difficulties of trying to purchase the unobtainable, they are now able to understand and sympathize with me as house- keeper. As regards food—of the unrationed articles I believe in giving maids an unstinted supply provided it does not entail waste or gross extravagance, and I also believe in studying the individual girL The maid who is out in the fresh air all day oan enjoy and digest what the cook who epentis hours over a hot stove cannot. The appetite of the latter is more capricious, and if any mistress has no sympathy in this matter let her try a week's cooking herself, and she will understand. Even in these days of difficulty one can Bun with management study the individual appetite to some extent. After all, the planning and shopping is our province, and we should take a pride in doing it with commonsense and discrimination. Some years ago I was at the head of a club for working girls, and I soon realized that the minds of the girls who were.growing up were not towards domestic service. After the war many sensible girls will be weary of war work, and glad to return to us again. It lies greatly in the hands of the mistresses as to whether they remain or not. In the meantime let mistresses be loyal to each other, and give striotly truthful and explicit references of the girls who leave their employ. Let them make themselves ,effiedent in the work their girls have to do, and then they will quickly know how to dispense with inefficient and undisciplined girls (of whom, ',Iasi there are only too many) and how to keep and encourage the capable
and trustworthy ones.—I am, Sir, &o., MART ROBERT& Colborn, Park Road, Wokinghant.
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