YOUR PROBLEMS SOLVED
Dear Mary. .
Q. In Zimbabwe we have a problem with insecticide-resistant fleas which some peo- ple have difficulty in controlling on their pets. Often these pets go into rooms which visitors use and the fleas hop off and lie in wait for the next occupants, sometimes weeks or months later. Naturally they are very hungry by then and it is not uncom- mon to see guests scratching their ankles on the first day and other parts higher up the body as the weekend progresses. This happened to the writer not so long ago. How can he tactfully inform his hosts and so safely accept another invitation? Once bitten, twice shy.
A. Next time an invitation is extended say, `Your invitation is doubly welcome. Not only do I always enjoy visiting you, but we've got a plague of fleas in this house at the moment and it would be bliss to get away from them. . . ' A discussion will nat- urally open up about how your house was infested in the first place and what methods you are using for extermination. Steer your neighbour towards admitting that her own house is also infested, then trick her into Ruwa, Zimbabwe telling you what she proposes to do about it.
Q. How would you handle it when a neigh- bour (for whom you have never done any- thing special) hands over something she had offered to get for you, you thank her and ask how much you owe her and she replies, 'Nothing. It was only £5. Treat it as a present.'
Name withheld, Berkshire A. This may be a form of passive aggres- sion. You can counter it by insisting, 'Oh, but I must give you the £5, otherwise I'll feel I can never ask you again. But worse, you'll feel you can't ask me. . . . ' Q. I am shortly going to have to read a les- son in church. Although I am 41, I have never quite grown out of the feeling I am going to start laughing hysterically in church, especially if the focus of attention is on me. How on earth am I going to control myself?
Name and address withheld A. Buy a bulldog clip from an office sta- tionery outlet. Roll up your trouser-leg and snap it onto your calf just before you rise to approach the lectern. The sub-agonising nature of the pain you undergo will ensure that giggling is the last thing on your mind during your brief performance.
Q. I was recently caught in an unpleasant situation and because, in retrospect, I did not handle it as I feel I should have, I would like your advice in case a similar situ- ation should ever arise again.
A.B., London W8.
A. Since you have not revealed the nature of your problem it is not possible, on this occasion, to offer you any advice.
Mary Killen
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