Trousers out of the blue
Sir: Jeffrey Bernard hs recycled two excel- lent stories, virtually intact, told by his friend Guy (Low life, 4 July).
However, in the version 25 years ago, the man on the Sevenoaks train purchased the replacement trousers from Marks & Spencer — a minor detail. Then, as now, much discussion ensued of the correct posi- tion of the 'V' (front or back) of a V-neck pullover when converted and worn for emergency use as a pair of underpants.
But what has kept me awake since is con- cern for the equally unfortunate recipient (possibly the catcher) of the soiled trouser and pants package, hurled from the train into a suburban garden. What took place here? What was the reaction on the ground?
Like the first story from the ski slopes, there must be a sequel. For instance, has any Spectator reader heard from a man, or about a man who, while tending roses, watching trains, has a parcel unexpectedly land at his feet?
In the event, did he examine the contents and, (a) Have them dry-cleaned and returned with a note, plus the bill attached?
(b) Re-wrap the parcel and return it to British Rail, with an anonymous note attached?
Or, (c) Turn to his wife and ask: 'When will our luck ever change?'
Someone somewhere has the answer. Charles Lewis
2 Camden Cottages, Ramsgate, Kent
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