YOUR PROBLEMS SOLVED
Dear Mary
Once again Mary has invited some of her favoured persons of distinction to submit Christmas queries.
From Sir Tim Rice Q. I have recently employed a full-time driver. A friend (a well-known art dealer and social gadabout) has informed me and many of my close circle that it is considered common to sit in the back of a car when being driven. This has caused me some distress. I am painfully aware that among the highly competitive brotherhood of drivers I may be harming my new employee’s standing by not sitting in the front with him. Of course, it would be foolish to take this issue to the extremes of a late friend of mine, a distinguished cricket writer who was such a snob that he refused to be in the same car as his driver, but I would very much like to keep all concerned happy. As I am 6ft4, the back of the car has great appeal. How can I remain stretched out in comfort while retaining my driver’s respect for me, and that of his peers for him?
A. Your art dealer friend is misinformed. Professional drivers consider themselves members of the caring classes. As part of being professional, they want their employers to enjoy their care: to be able to consume alcohol and dispense with the nuisance of parking and use the car as a temporary capsule of mental privacy between socially draining events. For this reason they will not take it personally if you do not address a word to them. Since it is obviously more comfortable in the back, and ecologically incorrect not to utilise that space, they also prefer it if you sit there. Incidentally, for reasons of clutter management and their own privacy, drivers prefer the passenger seat to be free.
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