21 SEPTEMBER 1991, Page 53

No. 1697: Was he there?

There are some journalists who, one sus- pects, were not present at the scenes they describe, whether covering a local war or playing a round over the latest chic golf course, but were present in the bar. A report, please (maximum 150 words), of some Interesting' event by one such alco- holic bluffer. Entries to 'Competition No. 1697' by 4 October.