22 APRIL 2006, Page 40

His Day

Saint George has spent years in denial.

His image has had a bad press. There’s been, as shrinks say, for some while A problem he needs to address.

I suppose it’s not really surprising He’s pining for something to clout, For even with wide advertising There aren’t many dragons about.

And where is the Maiden Worth Saving?

(To find any maiden is rare.) White flags with red crosses are waving.

His country is deep in despair.

This England is full of old women Who’d love to be saved by a Saint. The Union flag needed trimming. Old age is disguised by war paint.

There’s a wild Paper Dragon in Brussels Whose fierce breath brings tears to old eyes.

Our Patron is flexing his muscles. Saint George, England needs you. Arise!