24 OCTOBER 1998, Page 75

No. 2059: Damn dozen

The following words or phrases can all be used as expletives: coo, by George, blast, sugar, dash, gracious, mercy, dam, blow, bother, my sainted aunt, bugger. Using them non-expletively, you are invited to incorpo- rate them, in any order, in an entertaining piece of prose. Maximum 150 words. Entries to 'Competition No. 2059' by 5 November.