26 FEBRUARY 1983, Page 34

High life

Getting away

Taki

New York This is my last week in this ghastly place. Never have I seen ruder people anywhere, not even in Moscow. Last week I gave a dinner for my friend Christopher Gilmour, and after waiting about 15 minutes for a waiter, I finally waved to one. Being American he waved back. Being Greek I lost my temper and told him I was never rude to working people, especially to waiters, but that I was about to make an ex- ception in his case. He replied by saying that he, too, would make an exception and be rude to me. Well, I know how to handle insolent, college-educated waiters who believe in equality as long as it is me who is paying the bills. I asked him to step outside and to forget the customer-waiter relation- ship. Being college-educated, however, he was smart. He refused my offer and everyone settled down to a peaceful meal. Everyone except me, of course. I know very well what disgruntled waiters do in ones soup when in the kitchen, so I passed mine on to the hungriest person at the table IA° was, needless to say, the hog-like Haden- Guest. In two more days I shall be out of this city and on my way to London via Gstaad• The bad news, however, reached me before I had even begun to think about shooshing down the slopes. It seems that Gstaad has been discovered by everyone except Yuri. Andropov. (Incidentally, whilst on the sub- ject of the Russian Freud, how did you like

the job the egregious Harrison Salisbury did on him in the Western press? You know, his fondness for Glenn Miller records, his pro- pensity for staying up late discussing issues with dissidents and then sending them home in his chauffeured limo, his love for American scotch and so on. The only thing for sure is that Andropov thinks Glenn Miller was a CIA agent, and the only dissidents he has conversed with have been lying horizontal and lobotomised.) Now I am not saying that Adnan Khashoggi is worse than Andropov, but he has just as many bodyguards. However, there is more. I heard that Walid Jumblatt, the Druse leader of the sovereign republic of Lebanon, was in Gstaad recently. Can you Imagine Jumblatt, fresh from throwing grenades against the Christian militias, frolicking in the snow at Gstaad? And there was Mrs Jacob Rothschild, a woman whom I once mistakenly took for her mother-in- law, and who has since turned prematurely

very old.

From Serena Rothschild to Jumblatt to Khashoggi — it reads more like the Augean Stables than a ski resort, but I am an op- timist. The two Arabs don't ski, and Mrs Rothschild is rather bland, so I might miss her. Who knows, I might even have a good time, something that is getting harder to do in places like Gstaad because of the people who have suddenly discovered snow's wonderful effects. Oh, I almost forgot, Jerry Zipkin is also going to be there. Zipkin is to Mrs Reagan what Charles Ben- son is to Robert Sangster; or Philip Martyn to anyone famous. Zipkin is staying with My friends the Buckleys, so I can't say anything really rude about him, except that he Is one person I know will not go near the slopes because he is afraid the snow will spoil his make-up.

Although it's sad to complain before reaching one's destination, I am afraid that tt's inevitable. The sensible thing to do would be to stay put, but suddenly I have got itchy feet. I've now been in New York for more than two months and am definite- ly going crazy. Last week I had lunch at Lewis Lehrman's Institute, and discussed Politics and the cinema. Although everybody round the table was much cleverer than me, I learned absolutely nothing, first of all because a very nice pro- fessor asked me to be quiet every time 1 opened my mouth, then because the lefties refused to admit that people like Meryl Streep — a woman who had never heard about the splitting of the atom until six months ago but is now at the forefront of the anti-nuclear campaign — might not be totally committed to the cause of social Justice. Everyone kept telling me to be quiet except for a petite lady. Her name was Dorothy and she confided to me that War- ren Beatty is scheduled to play Michael Straight in the forthcoming film of that man's' life. Who will play Anthony Blunt, Guy Burgess and the rest of the Cambridge gay traitors? Apparently there are talent sco uts cruising San Francisco right this Minute looking for new faces.