High life
Papa croc
Taki
know it sounds crazy, but this is the ideal time to visit the Big Olive. During the last two weeks of August the great mass of Athens-dwellers flees its grotesque archi- tecture, its lethal heat and intolerable levels of pollution, thus making the place livable by default. More important, the government and the crooks who work for it are away, which means the few honest souls that stay behind can go about their business without interference.
There is no government in Europe more intrusive than that of Andreas the First, but come the heat waves of August it retreats to air-conditioned ministries, plea- sure boats and the cool islands of the Ionian and Aegean, giving the citizens .4 break. And there are other advantages in not having a sitting parliament. Things such as traffic cops reverting to type and directing traffic, which in normal times they are unable to do in view of the fact that they are busy escorting various big shots to and fro. There are also seats to be found for the various summer festivals, which otherwise would almost all be taken by those who owe their jobs to King Andreas. Last but not least, one can eat in relative peace in the few good tavernas favoured by the ruling socialist party.
The big news upon arrival was the marital problems of the Papandreou duo. A letter sent by the director of the prune minister's office to the ministry of foreign affairs (no pun intended either by the PM's office or by me) requested that invitations to presidential and diplomatic functions bear only the name of the premier and not that of his wife, Margaret Papandreou. Two days before the publication of the letter, local papers reported the rift to be political. Andreas was quoted as saying that his wife's activities with the feminist movement did not coincide with his as socialist party leader. It seems she had put forward lists of women for candidates in the upcoming elections who were not members of the party.
One reliable daily, the Free Press, gave a different version of the split. It showed a picture of Ms Lianis, the air hostess who has been Papa's paramour since last year, topless and lying on a beach in a provoca- tive pose. There was a large arrow pointing at her ample breasts and a caption that said, 'These are the two things that make our premier so happy.' The only people reputed not to have laughed were some of Margaret's bearded supporters from the feminist league. Personally, I am not surprised at Andreas's shenanigans. The corruption of his government has been unprecedented in a country known for corrupt governments. His close associates have enriched them- selves beyond belief, and it is said that he and his family will emerge Mobutu-like one day. Greece, in the meantime, has been caught cheating in 26 separate cases Where the EEC is concerned. The wimps in Brussels have done nothing more than drag the cheats in front of the European Court of Justice for the traditional slap on the wrist.
Now although I am the last man to cast a stone against an adulterer, I will heave a big one against the devious Andreas be- cause of his hypocrisy. He claims to have restored Greek pride, but in reality has turned the nation into a terrorist battle- ground, a shade better than Beirut. He brags about the economic recovery, but dunng Greece's presidency of the EEC figures this month revealed that we have now allowed even Portugal to pull ahead in per capita income, leaving us at the bottom of the EEC heap. (We are better off than Bangladesh, however.) Worst of all as far as I am concerned, he has committed adultery and separated from his wife of more than 30 years, and is claiming politic- al reasons of state. Were I a feminist I would send a commando team to capture urn and castrate him. Like all ugly men who lack charm, Papandreou never exactly cut a wide swathe with the fair sex until he became premier. That is when his priapism sur- faced. Last year it won him brownie points with the macho types. This year the chick- ens have come home to roost. Women are calling for his you know what. As the wise man said, the older and balder the poi, the bigger the breasts of the bimbo.
Previous page
