Q. I have a close friend of whom I am
very fond, but who has the unfortunate habit of perpetual name-dropping. She is intelligent, highly educated, rich and wellconnected, but it seems is still socially insecure. If she finds herself in a milieu she is not quite at home in — for example, among people she views as either above or below what she sees as her social station — she name drops dreadfully. This is an embarrassment to her family and close friends as it makes her look either pretentious or patronising. She really has no need to boost her own sense of worth in this way. Can you suggest a kind and tactful way of curing her of this habit?
Name and address withheld A. When you are arranging to meet her next, say, ‘It will be lovely to see you but don’t bother to bring your autograph book — there won’t be any big names there.’ This will give her pause for thought.
If you have a problem write to Dear Mary, c/o The Spectator, 22 Old Queen Street, London SW1H 9HP.
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