28 OCTOBER 2006, Page 87

least greeting each friend on arrival. But with each new

introduction taking at least three minutes to effect — not counting crossing the room to arrive at the target — it is unrealistic to expect to make more than five introductions per hour. The technique, therefore, is to hand out numbered stickers to each guest to wear on their lapel or similar. Each guest should also be handed a dance-card-style postcard with the names and numbers of the other guests you have decreed they would enjoy meeting in the course of the evening. People can then scan others’ lapels before introducing themselves saying, ‘I’m not sure why our host wanted us to meet but your number’s on my card.’ Enjoyable revelations then pour forth as the couple tackle the mystery of what they might have in common.

Q. I was recently given the present of a one-and-a-half-hour facial at a top London spa. This started with the usual polite chit-chat but I was unable to ‘shut down’ conversation with the therapist thereafter and this slightly spoilt the relaxation element of my dermatological treat. How could I have maintained silence without causing offence?

S.H., Woodborough, Wilts A. You could have held forth animatedly for one final burst of talking, then slapped yourself on the wrist saying, ‘I’m so sorry. You must stop me from chattering. My friend who gave me this treatment said she would be really annoyed with me if I gabbled away as I normally do. She said the whole point is to say nothing at all so you can really relax. So I’ll shut up now.’