Q. At a recent literary party in the Basil Street
Hotel, I was introduced to one of my great heroes, Professor Roy Foster. He was on my shortlist of people I have always wanted to meet, the others being Alan Clark — alas, no longer possible — and Torvill and Dean. However, when the magic and longed-for moment finally became reality, I found myself utterly tongue-tied. 'I do admire your work,' I stuttered imbecilically and then was unable to think of anything else. Professor Foster soon wandered off in search of more entertaining company. Can you think of a good all-purpose gambit. which can be used when meeting intellectual giants to keep them babbling while one plays for time?
S. T, Chirton, Wiltshire A. You could detain them for at least a minute and a half by declaring, 'I often fantasise about you. . . '. Pause for dramatic effect before adding, 'appearing in an intellectual version of Big Brother co-ordinated by Alain de Botton. If it were ever to come off, which fellow intellectuals would you like to be trapped with?'
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