High life
What a couple
Taki
Lili Mahtani and I met only once, at a Mortimer's party in the Big Bagel last year, and she could not have been nicer. After lots of drinking and dancing, I asked her to get rid of her escort for the evening, a friend of mine, and go with me to Elaine's, the more plebeian watering hole down the road. Lili showed very good sense that night. She stuck to my friend and Mor- timer's. I ended up with two drunken women shouting abuse when Elaine's shut at 5 a.m.
If Lili had shown the same prudence where Fergie is concerned, she would prob- ably be 90 grand richer today. Be that as it may, Fergie met Lili through an American, Eric Butterbaugh.
Butterbaugh I have never met, or, if I have, I'm not aware of it. What intrigues me is how an American from a one-horse town, as they say, can come over here and introduce Fergie around to the rich but not famous. Back in the good old days, Mr But- terbaugh would have trouble getting into Claridge's. Now he's in and out of Bucking- ham Palace, or used to be. As somebody famously once said before going to t he Riviera for good, 'Something must be done.'
The irony is that Lili hardly knew Fergie when she loaned the moolah. They had met two or three times. In any case, if returned, the money will go to a charity named by Lili, although I wouldn't hold my breath if I were she. In the meantime, the headlines about Fergie's debts were the last thing the royal family needed.
Although once upon a time I flirted quite seriously with republicanism, I now know that it's the quickest road to hell for a country. I saw what happened to mine, with straw men following orders from crooked prime ministers, or totally power- less figures as heads of state incapable of even applying the constitution. In France, the egregious Mitterrand ran the country as his fiefdom, illegally bugging friend and foe, housing his various ugly mistresses, and entertaining people who should have been jailed for life after the war.
And this is nothing compared to the cor- ruption and millions of kickbacks received by his cronies from state enterprises. In my opinion, Mitterrand was close to an evil genius, a liar, a moral and spiritual bankrupt, and the• most corrupt head of state in Europe. Past Italian heads of state were known to have had their hands deep in the kitty, and to have turned a blind eye while crooked politicians dealt openly with the Mafia.
Compare this with Britain's, Sweden's, Denmark's, Holland's, Belgium's and Spain's royal families, and shout 'royalty for ever'. OK, so we have shy Di calling the press, being advised by American-trained misandrists, driving a sweet girl like Tiggy to tears by being bitchy — and a liar to boot. If any reasonable person compares the pros and cons of, say, Mitterrand's cor- ruption as opposed to Di's madness, and chooses the former, then Grozny is a healthier place than Gstaad.
The unfortunate thing is that all the troubles caused by these two women could have been avoided if Lady Fermoy, Princess Diana's grandma, had done what she wanted to do but chickened out of at the last minute. The old lady's plan was to tell the Queen that Diana was unstable and unsuitable as a wife to the heir to the throne. But she put it off and then it was too late, and now we have Susie baby hold- ing the royal family hostage.
Personally, I believe the Queen is also at fault. As great as she's been as a monarch, she should have at least told Andrew to have all the fun he wished with Fergie, but chalet girls do not princesses make. Instead, she put her head in the sand, and is now probably as horrified as anyone to see what these two Sloanes have done to Europe's oldest monarchy.
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