3 MARCH 2007, Page 71

Q. This week I went to the opera and during

the intermission I was invited to share a glass of wine at a private gathering, at which time I was introduced to several people and I extended my hand in greeting to each. One man took my hand with unexpected enthusiasm and kept me captive in his vice-like grip for what felt like an eternity, the pain exacerbated by a large ring I was wearing. The rest of the performance was spoilt nursing my throbbing limb. I felt more despondent than the dying heroine. It’s not the first time this has happened to me and obviously many other women, so my question is how to reclaim the hand gracefully and promptly, as there are no obvious indicators that you are about be subjected to such treatment.

N.B., Adelaide, Australia A. If you have a glass in your left hand pass it wordlessly to someone nearby. Then — as though in a botched attempt to clap him on the back in response to his own warm greeting — use your free hand to tickle the hand-crusher’s right armpit. As a reflex he will immediately loosen his grip. At this point you can giggle pleasantly, ‘Oh sorry, did I tickle you?!’

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