YOUR PROBLEMS SOLVED
Dear Mary.. .
Q. How can we prevent our Dutch au pair girl from drinking too much? She eats nor- mal amounts of food but is constantly pour- ing bottles of Aqua Libra, Perrier and juice down her throat. She is very pleasant and apple-cheeked and healthy and always gasps laaa!' with satisfaction when she has finished a drink. It therefore seems mean and churlish to say something like, 'Hang on a minute, that's five pounds sixty-nine pence worth you've drunk so far already today!' What can we do? It is her first job, so we do not want her to feel unwelcome. On the other hand, we cannot afford anoth- er £42 per week going out on top of her wages.
IS., London SW10 A. Let your stocks of drinks run right down, then take the car to a supermarket. Say to your au pair, wait in the car while you Pop in and just buy enough soft drinks for yourself for a week.' Add, 'Don't cater for us because we're going on a week-long internal cleansing diet which involves drinking only root ginger and lemon juice.' Give her your purse with £50 cash inside, and say, 'I think there's plenty of money in there.' No doubt the girl, who you say is pleasant, will be shocked when she reaches the check-out till to see how much her `habit' has been costing you. She probably had no idea and will now try to moderate her appetite.
Q. Is it all right to put 'quid' instead of `pounds' on a cheque? I have just opened a bank account and am trying to think of ways to amuse my friends and annoy my parents.
E.W., Malvem A. As banks have to cater for half-witted customers, as well as those trying to annoy their parents, yes, they will cash cheques with 'quid' on them instead of 'pounds'. Do not push your luck, however, as banks get fed up with schoolboys. One, whose cheque for 'five pounds — not a penny more not a penny less' was recently presented to a bank, found it was rejected.
Q. I have one friend who always dresses down and looks unbelievably dreary at par- ties. She dresses in such miserable rags that it makes me feel quite depressed even to look at her. Incidentally, she is jolly rich and pretty, and I think she is trying to make some sad little point by doing this.
E.P., W11 A. Next time you send an invitation to this particular friend, write on her invitation `Fang Dress — Jet Set'. This will ensure she pulls her socks up, and she may even get a taste for looking attractive which may become habit-forming.
If you have a problem, write to Mary Killen, c/o The Spectator, 56 Doughty Street, Lon- don, WC1N 2LL.
Previous page
