Q. Two friends of mine would be great as a
couple but despite having often sat next to each other at dinner, and even been out to dinner alone together at least three times, nothing has happened. I can tell that they fancy each other but both feel embarrassed about making a pass since they have known each other for so long. Now they are coming to stay with me for a long weekend in Scotland in a fairly big house party. How can I, without it being obvious, move things forward and ensure that they hook up and become a couple? Don’t suggest I put them in the same room and pretend it was an accident; that wouldn’t work!
Name and address withheld A. I wouldn’t dream of suggesting anything so coarse. However, it will do no harm to impose a degree of physical intimacy upon this couple so that they get the taste for it. You may engineer this by the following mathematical method. Think through how many car seats will be available for trips, and how many guests to fill them. Take away availability of cars or add to the numbers of guests until such time as you are one seat short. When setting out on a trip — and I can see from your address that you are located in the centre of some fairly traffic-free moorland — one member of the party should arrange it so that the man in question is herded into a back seat by a window while you delay the female’s departure from your house. She will thereby be presented with a fait accompli and forced to climb on to the lap of the man in question for the trip. In this way their bodies will be thrust against one another in a rhythmic manner. Having thereby overcome the initial barrier of the embarrassing pass, you will find the couple move quickly on to developing their intimacy further.
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