To V.A.T.
How wonderful to find a way
To tax most things for which we pay.
Vat's such a jolly little tax To pay on clothes and cars and snacks, On kettles, nails and sealing-wax. We laud this April's foolish day.
We've now got rid of S.E.T. Which should be good for you and me.
Retailers in a happy mood, All anxious for consumers' good, May even drop the price of food In good-hearted philanthropy.
The way Vat works is really fun. You pay on all the work you've done,
Which value adds to anything. Yet virtue its reward does bring, For you your customer can sting, And so is compensation won.
Yet if you are nubile and slim, And so can wear young children's trim, It's all scot-free; and if you eat Your fish and chips out in the street, It's all a lovely untaxed treat, With joy your vat's filled to the brim.
And should you want a cup of tea, When out, it's taxed, at home, it's free.
Such are the blessings of this tax, Which scarcely any virtue lacks; With every day its joys will wax. We hail thee, blessed V.A.T.
Basil Charles
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