27 MAY 1995, page 56

Half Life

The full banana Carole Morin M addie telephoned in the middle of the night to boast about her heart attack. `It's your mother,' Dangerous Donald muttered, passing me the phone.......

Low Life

Fear of living too long Jeffrey Bernard L ast weekend began as a financial disas- ter when I put £100 on Manchester United to win the Cup Final. As I am particularly uninspired......