8 SEPTEMBER 2001, page 63

Football's Osric

Simon Barnes DOST know this water-fly? There was a time when, had you not known him, your state would have been more gracious, for 'twas a vice to know him. The fop, the dandy,......

Q. May I Pass On A Tip To Readers? I

always take a minicab to Heathrow (from my house in Kensington) for the obvious reason that it is cheaper than a black cab. On the return journey, however, it is difficult to......

Q. When Holding A Glass Of Champagne At Receptions Where

a speech is being given, I often wonder what one is supposed to do about clapping. It seems to me that you can either playfully pat the hand holding the champagne and thus risk......

Q. With The Terrible Spectre Of 'networking' Hovering...

many social events these days, I have begun to feel that it might perhaps have become less acceptable than it was to ask new people one meets at parties what they do. The......

Q. A Friend Of Mine Has Had Three Little Boys

in quick succession and I am godmother to one of them. My problem is that I cannot remember which one is my godson. This is not so bad as it sounds as, since I live in Norfolk,......