YOUR PROBLEMS SOLVED
Dear Mary. . .
Q. I am a hospital nurse and the epitome of caring courtesy by the start of my 7 a.m. Shift. To achieve that state I require ten Minutes of caffeine-related isolation. So I have a cup of tea in the hospital canteen, Which is usually deserted at that hour of the Morning. Recently, another nurse, whom I do not know, has taken to imbibing at the same hour. She picks her way between the empty tables to gabble at me. She has every right to be there and I do not wish to be rode to her but how can I discourage her? Lives may depend on your reply.
Registered General Nurse, Glasgow 4. You could pop into Woolworths and buy one of the new, virtually weightless radios With headphones which cost a minuscule amount and which are worn, like Sony Walkmen, by gardeners and joggers while they go about their leisure pursuits. Wear the headset into the canteen. Smile vaguely While staring at this nurse's mouth when She comes up to speak to you. 'Sorry?' you can shout loudly, only partially removing the headphones. 'I'm just catching up on the news/listening to Thought for the Day. I always do at this time,' you can bawl pleas- antly. Q. I recently hosted a sumptuous dinner for a chosen number of mostly new and pass- ably glamorous friends on the occasion of my 40th birthday. Not wishing to solicit presents and draw attention to the impor- tance of the occasion, in the perhaps vain hope that I might continue to pass for a sprightly 39-year-old for a number of years to come I had omitted any reference to the nature of the celebration on the invita- tions. However some presents were brought. Not wanting to embarrass anyone who had failed to mark the occasion with a suitable offering, I had brought a large plastic bag into which all gifts were hastily secreted. The following morning I had the pleasure of opening them. Unfor- tunately, some of the labels had become
detached and it has become impossible to match the presents to the donors. Being naturally delighted with an array of things I would never have dreamed of buying myself, I would like to be able to write and thank the generous benefactors. How would you suggest I go about this delicate task without embarrassing at least some of my guests, who may then feel pressured to proffer more charming gifts, which would be quite otiose this long after the event?
Name and address withheld A. There must be at least one present which you can marry up with its donor. Explain your position to this friend, who will, no doubt, feel deeply smug. Ask that he or she co-operate with you in ringing up all those who need to be eliminated from your enquiries and saying, 'I'm going to another 40th birthday party in a couple of weeks and I've completely run out of ideas for presents. Have you any? What did you buy for X's party — or didn't you bother?' The information gleaned can be passed directly on to you.
Mary Killen
Previous page
