COMPETITION

PC Grundy

J aspistos

IN COMPETITION NO. 1893 you were invited to write a letter to a public librarian from a PC angle, complaining about the contents and implications of some well- known children's book.

There is surely in literature for the young no passage more shocking than the one in The Crab with the Golden Claws where Captain Haddock, demented by Saharan heat, tries to screw Tintin's head off under the impression that it is the cork of a bot- tle. Alice contains some pretty dangerous stuff too — an opium-addicted caterpillar, a spaced-out cat, a pepper junkie, croquet with live flamingoes as mallets and hedge- hogs as balls ('why not use a kitten as a football?' one of you reasonably asked), not to mention all those heartlessly eaten oysters. Even Postman Pat was criticised 'a more depressing picture of the British working man's inadequacies it is hard to imagine'.

The prizewinners, printed below, get £20 each, and the bonus bottle of Isle of Jura Single Malt Scotch whisky goes to W.J. Webster.

As members of the Corrective Collective we write to demand removal of the self-described

Just William books from young person access.

We are outraged by the systematic peripheral- isation of all the female characters. Within the archaic familial structure the roles of both moth- er and sister are seen as programmatically reac- tive. Their contribution to the male-driven plots is shadowy, tangential and inherently negative. Outside this sub-group the one self-empowered female character with practised assertiveness skills is Violet Elizabeth Bott. However, even she is shown achieving her circumscribed aims by threatening to mimic bulimic symptoms. This makes her a lethal role-model for young female persons.

Additionally, we cannot tolerate the crypto- ethnic identity suppression displayed in the use of the nickname 'Ginger' for one of the young males, whose actual name is never revealed. The dangers of this form of societal invisibilising need hardly be described. (W.J. Webster)

I note with disgust that the Observer's Book of Birds is prominently displayed in the Children's section of your library. How many more devel- oping minds must be poisoned by this filth before the council sees sense?

In every page one witnesses the reinforcement of cultural stereotypes, the promulgation of racist, sexist and sizeist bigotry under the guise of 'natural history'. Think of the differently enlarded child reading about gannets. The alope- cia sufferer contemplating a bald eagle. The class victim struggling to cope with the notion of a common sandpiper. The adoptee crying her/him- self to sleep after reading the book's vilification of the female cuckoo's alternative lifestyle. And why blackbird? Wouldn't afrothrush be more accurate and less offensive? From the nomencla- ture generally we can conclude that the corrupt apostles of Linnaeus owe more to the locker room than to the taxonomist's laboratory.

Shag ...great tit ...mute swan please!

(Davis Jones) Are you aware that your library displays no fewer than four copies of Daisy Ashford's The Young fruiters? Though Hampstead and moral laxity go hand in hand, I would urge you to with- draw this book, notwithstanding its anodyne preface by J.M. Barrie, whose name is no guar- antee of probity. It was clearly not written by a nine-year-old but by a jaded Edwardian pornog- rapher, and Mr Saltecna is plainly a child molester. Two chapter headings picked at ran- dom (Starting Gaily; A Gay Call) tend to ridicule an oppressed minority, as does the phrase, 'Ancesters do turn quear at times'. As for Edward Procurio, the surname speaks for itself. And what are we to make of Bernard's suspicion that Ethel might be suffering from a social dis- ease: 'I trust you have not got an illness my dar- ling, murmured Bernard'? But most offensive is the mention of Queen Victoria, quoted as hav- ing worn 'a small but costly crown' — an indeli- cate reference to an early family-planning device of which the late Queen Empress would never have availed herself. (Carlo Adito) `... without discernible reference to contempo- rary issues,' you said, when recommending this pernicious book. My antennae were instinctively alerted, but I hardly expected a crude apology for the elitist-power-structure/gender-oppression nexus. Toad's fixation with fast cars is naked cel- ebration of penis aggression fantasy. Protesters at his sick compulsive rapism are sneeringly vili- fied through his derisory prison sentence. This disgusting ideological stance is further rein- forced when Toad's escape is abetted by a demeaning series of servile female stereotypes.

The sham concern of Rat, Mole and Badger about Toad's macho gender imperialism is exposed in the final chapter. It is clear that they disapprove only insofar as it has permitted the ethic minority stoat/weasel underclass to tem- porarily reverse the normal pattern of bour- geois-chauvinist economic control. The violence of their return to Toad Hall offers direct support to the oppressive anti-squatter aspects of the Thatcherite Criminal Justice Act.

(Jonathan Sleigh) I am horrified that your staff recommended Treasure Island to my son. The whole essence of the novel is grossly classist. Squire Trelawney and his cronies represent the vested interests of inherited wealth. Their ultimate triumph over the working men of the crew conflicts with the egalitarian principles for which we all strive.

To make matters worse, the novelist relies for colour on the disabilities of certain characters. Were the whole tenor of the book not so vile, the appearance of 'partially-sighted Pew' might be acceptable, and it would be greatly preferable to have John Silver fitted with a proper artificial aid to mobility and full-length trousers on both legs. Furthermore, the choice of Israel as the first name of one of the hands clearly foments anti-Jewish prejudice of the worst kind.

(Dick Prosser)

No. 1896: Horribul visiter

The spelling is in honour of Daisy Ashford, but I want standard spelling in this compe- tition. You are invited to provide a descrip- tion, written by a nine-year-old to a friend, of a horrible visit by a horrible adult visitor. Entries to 'Competition No. 1896' by 24 August.