Old, dirty
Apart from social scrutinity there are some rather frightening medical examinations to be gone through before marrying in France — blood compatability tests and things that seem premature by English standards. Only one surgeon asked to see the bridegroom while I was there — but that was only because he had once strongly advised the bride to marry a member of his profession, a Scottish laird being a long way outside his calculations. A local Egyptologist described as an 'old dirty man' gave us a conducted tour of his filthy collection and as, a special treat to mark'the occasion, a drink of Marsala, a burst on his electric guitar and a glimpse of a plastic nude from the Folies Bergere usually hidden by a dusty purple shroud.
how bad you are at your trade, if you have a Face (or Lips) that fits, you can still go far. Having the right name also helps; but then none of us is responsible for his lowly birth.
Which thought puts me in mind of the Tory Member for South West Staffordshire, ,Mr Patrick Cormack, who (childless) has already put his sons down for Eton. Mr Cormack captured the Rotten Borough some years ago in a manner too painful to describe. The point is that he ousted another Tory, one Mr Fergus Montgomery. Mr Montgomery is now PPS to Mrs "Harmony Hair Spray" Thatcher.
Sir Tetton Hall tells me , that recently Harmony Hair Spray was invited to the Cormack constituency by Squire Gifford who threw a fine Ball at his country seat, Chillington Hall (which is in the heart of Cormack Land). Naturally, Harmony Hair Spray wanted to take her sprightly PPS and his good Lady. "Never," said Squire Gifford (repeating carefully the words Mr Cormack had told him to utter) "will I tolerate that man under my roof. If you bring him, Harmony, you will not be welcome."
Mrs Thatcher was so taken aback that she ordered the unfortunate Mr Montgomery into his kennel. "How odd," she later commented, "that people will not let bygones be bygones. Mr Cormack clearly never forgets." I can tell you, Harmony, he does not. And that is not the only elephantine thing about him.
Tom Puzzle
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