Television
Tasteless
Richard In grams
C ome readers have complained to me that the last historic issue of the Spectator consisted entirely of one contributor attacking another and vice versa. So it is with some trepidation that I return to the Great Brideshead Bum Debate, the main protagonists of which are myself (AntiGratuitous Gay Bums) and Auberon Waugh (Pro-Witty Life-Enhancing Bums). I was away in the North-East last week so I saw very little television and when I tried to watch Angela Rippon at Lindisfarne in a hotel bedroom the set unaccountably blacked out. On Tuesday night (Brideshead night) I was, as it happened, in Durham and my wife and I were enjoying a drink with Ms Sophie Waugh, daughter of the distinguished Spectator columnist. As 9 o'clock drew near she became increasingly impatient to return to her college to watch Brideshead and it fell to me to drive her back. Thus it was that I missed the first few minutes of last week's instalment. I am informed on very good authority, however, that the opening scene included yet another bum — that of Lord Sebastian Flyte taking a shower; and that on this occasion it was a
bum of the type that could in .no way be described by Mr Waugh and his Brideshead supporters as a witty and amusing bum. Rather was it a heavily serious bum and of no relevance whatever to the story. This week's episode, as it happens, was bumfree, though we did see Lord Sebastian sitting in the bath with his friend Mr Ryder squatting by his side. This seemed rather an improbable scene to me, so I referred to Evelyn Waugh's text only to find that in the original version the scene takes place in Sebastian's bedroom while he is getting dressed. Why change it to the bathroom — except to introduce nudity?
I do not labour the point out of some anti-homosexualist obsession, but because what has been done to Brideshead is typical of the way television debases almost everything it touches. All the critics have said how faithful a transcription Granada and Mr John Mortimer have made of the book, overlooking the way in which the producers could not resist the Bum Factor, thus 'spicing up' the relationship between Ryder and Flyte to suggest a homosexual liaison where there is nothing of the kind in Waugh's story, and thereby reducing the serial, in my jaundiced eyes at least, to the same level as The Borgias or any other old soap opera.
A specially extended Panorama (BBC 1) attempted to grapple with the issues raised by the case of Dr Arthur, the paediatrician acquitted last week of attempting to murder a three-day-old baby. There is a strong argument for keeping this kind of thing off the television on the grounds that it is too complex and that the telly tends to reduce any moral issue to a soggy blur. As with the recent Panorama programmes about brain death, Monday's discussion got absolutely nowhere and was only justifiable on the basis that in this it reflected public confusion. Whether because lawyers had advised them I don't know, but it had been decided not to go over the Dr Arthur affair, though this might have proved more profitable and interesting. Wherever possible it is better to deal with a specific case rather than throw together a mass of conflicting evidence. All the same I was reminded of a recent Granada discussion on the subject of euthanasia when doctors were questioned about borderline geriatric cases. They always talk about the welfare of the patient and his or her relatives but no one ever mentions the possibility that old people or deformed babies might be 'helped on their way' for the benefit of medical staff who would otherwise have to look after them.
I was pleased to welcome back Did You See. .? (BBC2) on Saturday which enabled me to get a glimpse of all the goodies I missed last week. Ludovic Kennedy's panel used to be guaranteed to collect some first-rate bores, but for some reason Mrs Whitehouse was included last week. I was reminded that not so long ago they rang me up and asked me if I would go on, but they never rang back. Perhaps they were frightened that I would just bang on about bums and other tasteless topics.
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