High life
Something .
to hide
Taki
LLAthens ike all men who have suffered at the hands of cunning linguist lawyers, I am praying that Count Tolstoy gets off. The crime of handing over the Cossacks and Croats is on a par with Nazi atrocities, and Count Tolstoy — along with Lord Bethel] — are morally correct in not letting us forget.
Needless to say, I am in no position to judge whether Lord Aldington is responsi- ble for the action, but there is no question that it was the British who took the decision and who handed them over. And having got away with it all these years, the least that can and should be done is for all the facts to be exposed. What I do know is that Count Tolstoy has an honourable name and an honourable face, and that whoever handed them over had — in the words of Teddy Roosevelt — the backbone of a chocolate éclair.
And speaking of chocolate éclair back- bones, how about the publishers of an unauthorised biography of one of the greatest name-droppers and self-publicists, Armand Hammer, friend of Lenin, Stalin, Brezhnev, Prince Charles and other mighty ones? No sooner had my old friend Peter Carter-Ruck threatened them with a law suit, than Ebury-Century-Hutchinson post- poned the October publication date. Old Armand has managed to suppress more unauthorised biographies than even Robert Maxwell, which is no small achievement — as well as proof that there is something very wrong with the libel laws in England. Just the fact that someone accused of theft like Andreas Papandreou chooses to sue Time magazine in London, rather than New York, proves my point that the law is on the side of those who have something to hide.
Mind you, being on the receiving end is not much fun, as I've discovered of late. Some horrendous libels concerning Greek friends have been attributed to me by Nigel Dempster, but I do not plan to go to court and make it worse. A ghastly-looking American by the name of Friedman — or something to that effect — wrote a book on Gianni Agnelli that was one long libel and lie. Gianni refused to sue and rightly so. Why give publicity to a bad book written by a lousy writer as well as one of the ugliest men ever to put pen on paper? Just to sit in court and look at him would be cruel and unusual punishment for Agnelli, so he wisely dropped it.
Which leads me to believe that people who sue — the Aga Khan, Robert Max- well, Armand Hammer and the creepy lawyer who hit me with a 15 million dollar one, a low life ambulance-chaser by the name of Golub (the case was thrown out of court) — do it both for the money as well as for the publicity.
Standing up in court and hearing their mouthpieces proclaim what great men they are must give them a hell of a boost. This is what I find wrong with the adversarial system. The mouthpiece must say all sorts of things which have nothing to do with the truth in order to show that his client has been libelled. When I was asked to speak to the law society of Oundle School, I had only one piece of advice to give the boys. If upon entering the court the judge looks like a man who would make love to his own wife while in an orgy, then settle im- mediately. If he looks like a swinger, fight the case to the end.
My point still stands. And I shall be available to advise Mr Peter Carter-Ruck when he begins his defence of Time maga- zine some time during late November. And I am willing to bet my last soon-to-be- devalued drachmas that the only Greek prime minister to be accused of stealing and receiving stolen money in our very long history will not attend the trial. He will either be on his way to Canada, Brazil or in the clink. I sincerely hope it's the latter, but knowing my countrymen I wouldn't put it past them to vote him prime minister and then put him in jail.
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