Your Problems Solved
Dear Maly Q. Last week I had dinner with some old friends in London. My husband was unable to join us since he was working late but came to pick me up at the end of the evening. When he arrived everyone had finished eating but we were all still sitting at the table. When a man walks into a room with ten people sitting at a table, one of whom is his wife and the other nine of whom he knows well, to whom should he correctly 'go' first? Opinion seems to be divided as to whether he should go first to his wife (who is quite cross with him for working late), or to one of his hosts.
A.E., Wilts A. He correctly goes first to his hostess then takes in his wife en route to his host. From the host he can then make a step-wise progression around the women at the table, alternating cheek-bashing for women with back-slapping for men. A word of warning — it is tempting for those sitting at a table to jump to their feet to show enthusiasm for the late arrival. This is an impulse best resisted since such jack-in-theboxing is unlikely to be uniform and will add to the late arrival's mental confusion regarding the precedence of greeting.
Q. During the shooting season our neighbour in the Old Rectory, who is too busy to pluck the game he shoots, struck a 'pluck three, keep two' deal with me. This suited everyone but the problem was that he was often equally too busy to drop the birds off at my cottage and would only alert me if he happened to run into me, by which time the birds were too high. How can I improve things next season?
Name and address withheld A. Suggest to your neighbour an arrangement whereby he leaves what game he might be considering putting your way hanging in a set place outside his rectory. Food wastage can thereby be avoided since, as you clearly have time on your hands, you could then do a daily drive-by to see what pickings are available.
Q. On occasions when I have been to stay with 'celebrities', Scrabble is sometimes suggested. While I am not particularly good at this game, I have always felt it is incumbent on me not to exert myself and to let the celebrity win in case their ego should be too fragile to cope with being trounced by a person they perceive to be of lower status. Is my instinct correct, Mary, or do you take the opposing view held by my husband? This is that celebrities welcome an element of competition since they are clearly competitive by nature, which is why they have got to where they have.
S.T., Devizes, Wilts A. You are both right in a way, because the celebrity must win. (It is your unspoken duty to boost their selfconfidence and shore up their sense of swagger.) However, you must create the illusion that they have deserved the victory. Therefore you should spend most of the game winning and keeping them only a few points behind you before making a calculated error to let them win in the end. This is possible with Scrabble, unlike some other games.
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