CONSUMING INTEREST

London Particular

By LESLIE ADRIAN

VENDING machines, those railway-station adornments that we used to call slot machines and look upon with tolerant amusement have become an abomina- tion. At least, to put it in perspective, they tried to sabotage my attempt to produce an appraisal of cheap guides to London. The London Transport Board, whose relations with the public must be about at the bottom of the Victoria Line, have just published a five-shilling booklet, Sportsman's London, by that amiable all-rounder Denzil Batchelor. You cannot buy it except through some slot machines on the Underground. You are asked to put in two half-crowns (Heaven help the foreign tourist who confuses this coin with a florin) and pull a lever. If nothing happens as a consequence, the British Automatic Com- pany requires you to apply in writing to an address in EC2. From Honolulu or Seattle, pre- sumably. Should you try asking the ticket office, they are helpless. 'Not our machines,' they cry. 'But it's your book, advertised on your trains.' 'Awfully sorry. Nothing we can do.'

Mr Michael Robbins, who is ultimately respon- sible for this odd state of affairs, will surely have an answer. Meanwhile, BAC of EC2, please can I have the five bob stuck in the gullet of your reluctant robot at Marble Arch station? Oh, yes, Mr Robbins, why can't we just buy The book at a boblistall? So much more reliable than these machines 'which reject good money (01- give nothing in return for it) and swallow

had (Irish pennies and the like). '

You can buy over the counter, iri fact, an extra- ordinary assortment of pocket guides to London, from the Greater London Council's shilling book- let Open-Air Entertainment, an optimistic exer- rise in our area of high rainfall, to the solid and reliable Blue Guide to London (22s. 6d.), which,. for all its comprehensiveness, cannot help re-

flecting the official view, such as that only hand luggage is allowed on the Underground. Fallen ever any good steamer trunks lately? All such guides have severe, limitations simply because they have to do so much in so little space.

So it is worth splashing a few bob of holiday cash on some. light and humorous, yet useful, nonsense like the Good Loo Guide (3s. 6d.) and the Good Cuppa Guide 13s. 6d.), both by Jonathan Routh, which should mean that you

use them with some care. On the whole. I have found them reliable, but have been unable to test the tea either in Buckingham Palace or in Wormwood Scrubs. Even after studying the wealth of information in the cuppa guide, I feel that the only serious tea-rooms in Europe are

to be found in Paris and Florence. But Routh deserves to be put on permanent relief for his too guide (nothing to do with Waterloo, actually, except incidentally).

The oil companies have taken an active hand in plotting London, Shell with Exploring Leadon (8s. 6d..), by Isobel Barnett and Ronald

Searle, for the younger set, in which I could detect nothing specially appealing to them that could not be found in, for instance, Betty

James's London on fl a Day (12s. 6d.) or her London on Sunday, its twin, also from Batsford

and the same price. BP sponsors an established

faurite„ Denys .Parsons's What's Where in London (which has gone down in price to 5s.),

well worth the- money for visitors or Londoners nho like Shopping around fo'r old hunting horns, barrel organs, geckos,.planchettes or parana wood fruit bowls from Brazil. It is useful as well as quaint.

.Eating and drinking in London have just about been done to death, but it has not stopped Radio

London turning out Eat Well within your nzeans in London (7s. 6d.). which in fact means ten to fifteen shillings for a two-course meal and coffee, nithout tips or drinks. This supplements London f 1 a Day and the Observer's guide to. Free liyzdon, not buyable but there may be some

back numbers left, which suggests brewery visit- ing as one way to get a free drink. The National Union of Students does an annual guide to London for its impecunious members and once commented that there v'as a party going on in every large hotel almost every day, and usually it was easy enough to walk in, have a handful

of canapes and a couple of drinks and push off. The Eat Well booklet does in a short space ; %hat the two veteran food guides. Postgate and

Ronay, do for the whole country and well enough for London. But the snob food guide of the day is the one put together by Lady Hulton and

Willi Frischauer, the Gourmet's Guide (12s. 6d:),

list of twenty-four top eateries, from Mira- belle ('Very Expensive') to Maison Prunier (merely

'Espensive'). For the rich- who have too little

rAperience to know better, it could be useful. I couldn't help wishing it came with a built-in

credit card.- It was a relief to turn to London Pubs (guide to, I2s. 6d.), by Martin Green and . White, who must have enjoyed their 'esearch, but can't resist a cliche.

For the serious with time on their hands, I

offer a trio of unique London guides that hardly mention food; drink; lavatories 'or high society: Nairtt's London (8s. 6d.) and Piper's Companion Guide to London (30s., but a book to cherish) for topography, and Fitter's London's Natural History (16s. if still in print). There are cor- morants in St James's Park as well as guardsmen.