High life
Hack hypocrisy
Taki
'T here is something a little chilling about the spectacle of a rich man attempt- ing to hijack British politics.' This ludicrous sentence appeared last week in the Evening Standard, and, although Jimmy Goldsmith can take care of himself without the poor little Greek boy's help, I will nevertheless have my say. Max Hastings, the editor of the Standard, has always impressed me as the type of Englishman who automatically tugs his forelock whenever a toff happens to be near. His great joy is to be out huntin' and fishin' and shootin' with those he considers his superiors, which is the majority of the British people. I have only met the bum once, when he was writing the gossip for the Standard, and he misquoted me about Lucky Lucan. This was more than 20 years ago. The man looked awful then and he looks worse today. In fact, a
less appealing man I have never seen out- side Monte Carlo in the month of August. Hastings in my view is a crypto-socialist, a man consumed by envy and jealousy for those who have left him standing. He has throughout his life sucked up to rich pro- prietors while kicking helpless hacks when- ever the opportunity arose. In the morally shoddy media world of today, Max Hast- ings's editorial moralising comes across like Joseph Stalin in drag. One thing is for sure, Max does not like Sir Jimmy, and uses the editorial pages of his rag to go after him. 'What does Sir James have to offer save his cash?' asks Max. The question is as dumb as the man who posed it. Ensuring the elec- torate is given a chance to vote whether they wish to come under a new breed of coercive bureaucrooks striving to alter our culture is quite a good offer, I would think. Hastings also attacks Jimmy's friends and calls them 'louche'. This I actually found funny. Here is a real hack — among the lowest form of the species — calling his betters louche. When he goes after Jimmy's 'women, his exotic Mexican retreat, his extensive estate in France ...' Max shows his true colours. Like Richard Ingrams, whom I have always suspected of being a closet queen, and the grotesque bald midget Ian Slopout, Max is jealous as hell and can't take it any more. Well, there's nothing Max, Ingrams and Slopout can do about Jimmy's wealth and extensive estates, nor his women. Come to think of it, there's nothing they can do about mine either. When Wafic Said gave £20 million to Oxford University, hacks heaped abuse. When Alan Clark was revealed to have girlfriends, hacks wrung their hands in hor- ror. Great wealth and beautiful women are two things envious hacks can never aspire to. Ergo the massive belches of hack hypocrisy.
Which brings me to yet another Jimmy- hater, the indescribably vile David Mellor. It is obvious that the gap-toothed toe-suck- er is running scared. For Mellor to dismiss Goldsmith and people like Robin Birley and Mark Slater as nonentities seems to me an early sign of panic. Mellor is lewd and his ugly past mistresses are perfect examples of his lewdness. Mellor ditched his wife, who is going blind and who stood by him when he was caught in flagrante, for an even greater social climber than himself. I think that women Putney voters should be reminded of Mellor's despicable behaviour. Perhaps the family picture he posed for immediately after he got caught should be a Referendum Party poster. Mellor called Jimmy a harlot, probably one of the few things Jimmy doesn't know anything about. He likes sweet young girls from good fami- lies. Mellor is the expert where tarts are concerned, but what does the truth have to do with today's politics?
The Referendum Party is a noble gesture
and has nothing to do with ego or being a hobby horse, as the envious ones have sug- gested. Hastings, Mellor and others of their ilk should cool it and accept the fact that they are inferior in physical matters, as well as money, power and intellect. I guarantee it. Once they've accepted the truth, they'll feel a lot better.
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