ISLE OF J SI,LLI VW >Loki/ •1111111

URA

IN COMPETITION NO. 1936 you were invited to compose a public notice which appears to be in prose but is actually in verse, the more cleverly concealed the bet- ter.

Below the surface of a frost-bound garden There lurk hidden bulbs which are only biding their time

To burst forth in a riot of laughing colour (Unless the gardener has planted them upside down).

Christopher Fry? No, P.G. Wodehouse (Something Fresh, chapter 5). Many of our novelists slip into loose blank verse uncon- sciously, sometimes, like Dickens, for more than half a dozen lines at a time. Your entries were ingenious, some so ingenious

COMPETITION

The hidden Muse

Jaspistos

that it took all my concentration to spot the lurking Muse — thank you, those who provided me with bifocals by laying out the prose as verse separately.

Some of you made your task easier by using half-rhymes or extra-long lines like alexandrines or even lourteeners'. There was no harm in that, but in the end effort- less skill was of the essence. Only one of the prizewinners printed below (£20 each)

11,LLE 1141.1 SCOTCH WHISKI

iuluRe refused the challenge of rhyme. The bonus bottle of Isle of Jura Single Malt Scotch whisky just goes to Andrew Gibbons, whose neatly camouflaged Shakespearean sonnet edged out Gerard Benson's con- cealed 'In Memoriam' metre.

Take note that on the thirteenth day of June, at six p.m. precisely, Small & Tatt will sell by auc- tion contents of a soon-to-be-demolished Country Mansion that, for safety's sake and for the greater ease of viewing, have, by kind per- mission, been removed in toto to the Rat and Fleas — in which so-favoured tavern can be seen, besides our customary large selection of sundry goods too numerous to recall, the cele- brated Butcher-Leech collection of medical ephemera. In all, four hundred lots, saved from the recent fire. On view: the day of sale and two

days prior. (Andrew Gibbons) An application has been made, according to sub- section C (paragraph 2) of Winklesea Urban and District Council's Trade and Recreation (Build- ing and Development) Bye-Law ('08), to build a Swimming Pool and Skating Rink on undevel- oped land between the Sea Wall and Redd Cliff (known locally as Fiddler's Fence); a Paddling Pool, Ladies and Gents Facilities, Clock Golf and (if approved) a fully licensed bar will be attached; and the Cliff Trail made safe with Paving and Handrail. Note: Local labour will as far as possible be used. Objections to these developments should be filed at the Town Hall, Winklesea, under the relevant sub-sections (D/K) in Room 253 (Taxes) and must have been received by noon on Saturday the Fifth of June, by Hand or GPO. (Note: Faxes are NOT accept- able.) Please mark all envelopes in top left cor- ner: Development.

Signed: L.G. Homer, Mayor.

J. William Sprott, Town Clerk. (Gerard Benson) If clients need to empty a machine of someone else's clothes, please put their clean things in a bag — you would not wish to find your own all over the floor. The pipes behind are hot; ensure your little ones take care as they could hurt their fingers. Underwear and baby clothes etc. can become enmeshed between the spinner tub and drum. Be sure to place them well below the rim or you may lose them. Items such as gym-shoes must be tumble-dried at 'cool': at 'hot' their soles may mark the drum. Will clients not extin- guish cigarettes against the wall when speaking on the phone, and keep your call a 'short and sweet' one; others need it too, especially in the evenings. Thanking you. (Philip Irwin) Notice is hereby given that, where no contrary indication serves to show otherwise (and where, notwithstanding that, no visibly established habi- tat of any local species stands to be damaged or threatened ecologically, 'established' meaning in this context one functioning, prima facie, as the run of badgers, stoats or voles, or as the site of any small perennial plant which might be of importance scientifically or as a leisure plant, specifically bellflowers and columbines), visitors may ramble or picnic where they wish, or play any permitted ball-game on a pitch laid for such purposes (concerning which relevant sports are listed at the end of this advice — for further details send a specified request with sae to Parks Department, Plumtown, PT3 7KX), provided all due care is exercised in those locations where saplings are planted, and that dogs remain attached, at all times, to a lead or chain.

(Chris Tingley) Road-users driving west along the Bodmin by- pass may find their journey subject to delays throughout the summer months. The scope and scale of vital carriageway repairs necessitate, to our profound regret, this no doubt irksome inconvenience, for which we offer our sincere, heartfelt apologies, reminding motorists at the same time that mandatory speed limits of fifty miles an hour will be in place wherever traffic is restricted to a single lane. We also ask you please to bear in mind that though your journey times will be increased, resulting stress and strain may be relieved by frequent stops for light refreshments and the calls of nature, and the chance for stretching cramped and weary limbs. Since tiredness may kill, you must agree, to take a break makes sense. Remember too that such delays as may provoke your rage are of a tempo- rary kind, while those improvements we have