SPECTATOR CHRISTMAS QUIZ

Goodbye . . . hello

This year: 1 Whose dog, Chipper, said goodbye to this world after losing its life in a fight with its mistress's mother's dog, Ranger? 2 Who said hello to Dorneywood?

3 Who said goodbye to Gatcombe Park?

4 Who said hello to the National Executive of the Labour Party in place of Ken Livingstone?

5 Who said goodbye to his unbeaten record, including the Derby, at Longchamps?

6 Who said hello to the South Afri- can presidency on 20 September? 7 Who said goodbye to the Foreign Office after 94 days?

8 Who said hello to British Rail as its chairman and who said goodbye?

9 Which London gallery was invited to say goodbye to the genuineness of most of its Rembrandts?

10 Who said goodbye to his imminent chance to win the World Chess Championship, in favour of Jan Timman?

Words, words, words

This year who said: 1 'We are a grandmother.' 2 'I was offered money to run.'

3 Dr Runcie is a 'Jesuit in heart and soul . . . his grovelling to the Pope is despicable and contemptible'. 4 Of what, 'A charming picture taken in a public place'. 5 'It represents the.tip of a singularly ill-conceived iceberg.'

6 'I have nothing further . . . I don't know „ of course I don't know.'

The numbers came

This year: 1 Whose maid ran up a telephone bill of £5,697? 2 Who was awarded damages of £600,000 for libel by a jury in May? 3 Which musical, a remake of a film by Fritz Lang, folded after losing £2.5 million?

4 A garden statue, expected to fetch £4,000 at auction, reached £715,000, being detected as a Galatea by which sculptor? 5 Who was awarded £1.5 million damages for libel?

6 Which evangelist was sentenced to

Set by Christopher Howse

45 years in jail?

7 Which living artist fetched a record £13,639,092 for his 1955 abstract, `Interchange'?

8 Another garden statue, bought for £100, was sold for £6.82 million. To whom was it attributed?

9 Who got 33, and who 314, in an election?

10 A Turk was paid £2,500 for which organ?

Spades

1 let Spades be trumps! she said, and trumps they were.' Who was she?

2 Spades take up leaves No better than spoons And bags full of leaves Are light as balloons Who was the author?

3 On the so-called spade guinea the inscription is: M.B.F. et H. Rex F.D. B.L.D. S.R.I.T. et E. To whom does it refer?

4 With spots quadrangular of di'mond form, Ensanguined hearts, clubs typical of strife, And spades, the emblem of untimely graves Which poet, also the author of a poem on a sofa, wrote those verses?

Hearts

1 Which 19th-century naturalist ate the heart of a king of France? 2 And girls in slacks remember Dad

And oafish louts remember Mum, And sleepless children's hearts are glad, And Christmas morning bells say 'Come!' Even to shining ones who dwell Safe in the Dorchester Hotel

Which Poet Laureate wrote those lines?

3

Hearts just as pure and fair May beat in Belgrave Square As in the lowly air

Of - where?

4 I shall not rest quiet in Montparnasse. I shall not rest easy in Winchelsea. You may bury my body in Sussex grass, You may bury my tongue in Champmedy I shall not be there, I shall rise and pass. Bury my heart at - where?

5 Who said, 'Rule Forty-two. All persons more than a mile high to leave the court.'

Diamonds

1 Which French queen was involved in the Diamond Necklace Affair?

2 The little star,

Up above the world so high, Like a diamond in the sky!

becomes what, and like what, in Lewis Carroll's parody?

3 'Kissing your hand may make you feel very very good but a diamond and safire bracelet lasts forever,' — in which novel by Anita Loose does that occur?

4 This Jack, joke, poor potsherd, patch, matchwood, immortal diamond, Is immortal diamond.

Which Jesuit priest wrote that, and even if you know, in which poem?

5 'A diamond gone, cost me two thousand ducats!'

Which Shakespearian character ex- claimed thus?

Clubs

1 To which club did Mycroft Holmes belong?

2 For that matter, to which club did Jeeves belong?

3 'The best club in London,' said Mr Twemlow in Our Mutual Friend of where?

4 'She would have made Hercules have turned spit, yea, and have cleft his club to make the fire too,' is said of which other Shakespea- rian character?

SPECTATOR CHRISTMAS QUIZ

5 Johnson's club was in a lane named after which shrub?

Odds and ends

1 Which 19th-century naturalist rode a cayman and experimented with curare on a donkey?

2 Which poet continued to be a `Supertramp' after losing a leg?

3 Which journalist, upon being asked why he had a walking-stick, was said to have replied, 'To pro- tect myself from the Arabs, of course.'

4 James Thurber wrote: My own favourite item . . . is a suggestion from a reader, which goes like this:

March 20, 1927 THE NEW YORKER

I have an idea for a cartoon. The cartoon is entitled, 'Pouring over his Books'. This is a pun. Have a student sit by a desk with a stack of books before him and reading out of one book. In the meantime have him pour some gin in a glass and is ready to drink it. All about him on the floor have bottles thrown about.

The humor in this cartoon is in the words `pour' and 'poi? one means to drink and the other means to study careful.

Who had written in the margin of the note 'Too subtle'?

5 Who published the first volume of his autobiography on his 80th birthday and completed another nine volumes?

6 Which Catholic translator of the Bible was asked on his death-bed if he would like to be read to from his own New Testament and, as his last words, answered faintly, 'No', and then after a long pause, `Awfully jolly of you to suggest it, though'.

7 Who wrote: 'Napoleon's armies always used to march on their stomachs shouting, "Vive l'inter- ieur!"' 8 Which 18th-century naturalist had a tortoise called Timothy?

9 Who used all the following words, and what do they mean? a elenchi- cally; b dilucidate; c ariolation; d Saltimbancoes; e ingannations; f exantlation; g perpensions; h sti- rious; i strigments; j Cynegeticks.

10 Who, upon being told that Harold Wilson had been obliged to go to school as a child without boots, remarked, 'That was probably be- cause his boots were too small foir him.'

Temps perdu

This year: 1 Who kissed Mr Denis Thatcher's hand?

2 Who became non-communist Prime Minister of Poland?

3 Who said Shakespeare was an Arab?

4 Who was found innocent in Liver- pool of defrauding the Inland Re- venue on a grand scale?

5 What did the 92-year-old Mr Jerry Pratt give to the world of fashion?

6 What came down on 9 November?

7 Who appealed for the Three Graces on the back of a menu?

8 Of what did the critics say: 'Stale, messy and inconsequential'; 'For connoisseurs of the crass'; 'The drab look of an Oxfam shop sum- mer collection'?

9 Which horse shied after being nob- bled by ultrasonic binoculars?

10 What did a virus infect on Friday 13 October?

Notable

The answers to the following may be found in Geoffrey Madan's Note- books, edited by J.A. Gere and John Sparrow (Oxford Paper- back).

1 A. A correspondence between two clergy- men on Baptism and Regeneration. 1825 ZZ. Genuine will of clergyman, lately de- ceased, whose son deservedly possesses one of the highest stations in the Church: containing his remarkable apology for adul- tery. 1750. In which book are these the first and last entries?

2 In which book does no one cough, one person sneeze and is one woman's age given?

3 Who said to Ada Leverson, on his being released from prison, 'My dear, you're the only person in the world who'd have known the right hat to wear on an occasion like this.'

4 Which Prime Minister did De- smond MacCarthy describe as 'a flamingo in a farmyard'? 5 Which famous Master of Balliol said: 'Never marry the only good one of a family.'

6 Who refused to order his servant Frank to fetch his favourite cat as it was 'not good to employ human beings in the service of animals'? 7 Which Prime Minister occupied 18,000 columns of Hansard during his life and appears in 366 volumes?

8 Which Prime Minister's wife said, `Lord Birkenhead is very clever but sometimes his brains go to his head.'

9 Of which Prime Minister did New- man say: 'He talks of divinity as a clergyman talks of geology.'

Screen test

Nicholas Robson writes: Match the writers with the films in which they appeared.

1 Compton Mackenzie 2 Graham Greene 3 John Osborne 4 Truman Capote 5 P.J. Kavanagh 6 Marshall McLuhan 7 Gore Vidal 8 Mickey Spillane 9 Robert Benchley 10 William Burroughs a Murder by Death b Weekend at the Waldorf c Whisky Galore d Roma e The Girl Hunters f Get Carter g Annie Hall h Drugstore Cowboy i Day for Night j Half Moon Street Answers — page 100

Christmas Quiz — answers

Goodbye . . . hello. 1 The Queen; 2 Sir Geoffrey Howe, instead of Mr Lawson; 3 Captain Mark Phillips, on his separation from the Princess Royal; 4 Mr John Prescott; 5 Nashwan; 6 Mr Frederik de Klerk; 7 Mr John Major; 8 Bob Reid and Bob Reid; 9 The Wallace Collection; 10 Mr Jon Speelman.

Words, words, words. 1 Mrs Thatcher; 2 Steve Ovett; 3 Dr Ian Paisley; 4 Miss Wendy Henry of a picture she published of Prince William urinating; 5 Mr Lawson (of an article written by Sir Alan Walters); 6 Mrs Thatcher again, questioned about Mr Lawson's resignation.

The numbers came. 1 The Duchess of Argyll; 2 Mrs Sutcliffe; 3 Metropolis; 4 Giambologna; 5 Lord Aldington; 6 Jim Bakker; 7 Willem de Kooning; 8 Adriaen de Vries; 9 Sir Anthony Meyer and Mrs Thatcher; 10 A kidney.

Spades. 1 Belinda in Pope's Rape of the Lock; 2 Robert Frost (`Gathering Leaves'); 3 George III (Magnae Britanniae, Franciae, et Hiberniae Rex; Fidei Defensor; Brunsvicensis, Lunen: burgensis Dux; Sacri Romani Imperii Arch' Thesaurarius et Elector); 4 Cowper (`The Win-

ter Evening').

Hearts. 1 Francis Buckland; 2 John Betjeman (`Christmas'); 3 Seven Dials (lolanthe); 4 Wounded Knee (`American Names' by Stephen Vincent Benet); 5 The King of Hearts (Alice in Wonderland).

Diamonds. 1 Marie Antionctte; 2 Bat, tea tray; 3 Gentlemen Prefer Blondes; 4 Gerard Manley Hopkins, 'That Nature is a Heraclitean Fire; , Shylock.

Clubs. 1 The Diogenes; 2 The Junior Ganymede; 3 The House of Commons; 4 Beatrice (Much Ado About Nothing); 5 Ivy.

Odds and ends. 1 Charles Waterton; 2 W.14' Davies; 3 Paul Johnson, though he was only suffering from a ricked back; 4 Harold Ross; 5 Compton Mackenzie; 6 Ronald Knox; 7 WC' Sellar and R.J. Yeatman (1066 and All That); , Gilbert White; 9 Sir Thomas Browne (in Vulgar. Errors); a fallaciously; b explain; c soothsaying'

d mountebanks; e deceptions; f drawing out; considerations; h like icicles; i scrapings; .1 of hunting; 10 Harold Macmillan.

Temps perdu. 1 Mrs Bush; 2 Tadeusz Maz°," wiecki; 3 Colonel Gaddafi; 4 Mr Ken Dodd; 51,, tie knot; 6 The Berlin Wall; 7 Prince Charles; 6 A Masked Ball at the English National Opera; 9 Ile de Chypre; 10 Computers.

Notable. 1 The British Museum Catalogue; 2 The Bible; 3 Oscar Wilde; 4 Disraeli; 5 Jowett; , Dr Johnson; 7 Gladstone; 8 Margot Asquith; Y Gladstone again.

Screen test. 1 and c; 2 and i; 3 and f; 4 and a; 5, and j; 6 and g; 7 and d; 8 and e; 9 and b; 10 and h.