YOUR PROBLEMS SOLVED
Dear Mary..
Q. I suspect my boyfriend had a brief fling with a friend of mine the other night. I don't want to ask him directly because, if he admits it, it will be rather humiliating for me to continue going out with him and I don't want to stop. I just want to find out without him knowing that I know, as I can- not rest until I find out whether I am para- noid or whether it is true.
C.C., London SW11 A. Simply ring your boyfriend at work pre- tending to be the other girl. Disguise your voice by holding your nose. Say, 'Hello, it's Sarah [or whatever her name is]. I've got a frightful cold. How about you? Did you catch it?' Follow up this call by asking a male friend to phone Sarah, holding his nose and making the same enquiry. The timbre of their responses should illuminate you as to the extent of their dealings.
Q. I have employed an out-of-work friend to work as a builder in my new house. He is meant to be knocking down some walls in my attic, but instead he keeps knocking off to socialise with me, to take phone calls from friends, or to deal with admin prob- lems of his personal life. He is supposed to be on an hourly rate, so how can I deter- mine what to pay him when it is impossible to take account of all the interruptions?
S.C., Peacock Yard, London SE17 A. Why not issue your friend with one of the new electronic tags, programmed to go off each time he comes down from the attic? Set a ticking oven-timer a-going each time the bleeping starts and he pops down to waste some time with you, and dock the appropriate number of minutes from his wages. Two or three 'bursts' of this punish- ment and your friend will soon learn the Pavlovian reaction of staying `on site' until he has clocked up a reasonable number of man-hours.
Q. I lodge in a friend's house which is very nice except for the fact that her son, aged 17 and still at day school in London, who also lives in the house, has the appetite of six or seven men and always hovers over my food, plucking bits off my plate like a gan- net. It makes me very neurotic as I never know how much I am going to have to eat. How can I stop him? He eats separately with his mum, upstairs, but there is no point telling me to get my own back by plucking food off his plate later, as his mum would not stand for it.
MK, London W8 A. One method of dealing with this youth would be for you to confine the sort of foodstuffs you consume to dishes such as bouillabaisse, which are food-plucker- unfriendly.
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