A Penny of Observation
ARMADO : How hast thou purchased this experience ? Mora: By my penny of observation.
(Love's Labour's Lost.)
THE POST.
It was recently our good fortune to acquire, for the sum of one shilling, the Post Office Guide. We promised ourselves many hours of enjoyment and edification—of laughter and, perhaps, of tears—in the perusal of its 842 closely printed pages. Nor, at first, did it seem that we were to be dis- appointed. Many fascinating vistas of possibility are opened up in the earlier sections of the book. We had no idea, for instance, that you can send one of your fellow-beings through the post (see page 35). We would have welcomed fuller infor- mation on the subject. Does one stamp him ? And, if so, where ? Can one post people, against their will, to places which they have no wish to visit ? Supposing you took a friend into the Post Office and suddenly shoved him across the counter, at the same time crying, in a brisk, authoritative voice, "To Mallaig, please, and as quickly as possible " what would happen ? Unless he was found to contain any explosive sub- stance, any filth, or any advertisement offering to tell fortunes, or unless he had about him any gold bullion, live bees, or leeches, we do not see how the authorities could refuse to deliver him : provided, of course, that he was quietly and unostentatiously dressed, for it is clear from the chapter on "Embarrassing Postal Packets" that any packet "of a red colour, or of another colour likely to cause strain on the eyes of the officers of the Post Office" would not be acceptable.
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