I beg to differ... Briefs
The recent muliplex blockbuster 300, an historical epic concerning the Spartans fighting King Xerxes's Persian forces at the Battle of Thermopylae was remarkable in one chief respect: it subliminally projected the message that briefs are perfectly suitable attire for chaps.
Indeed, the Spartans throughout this film are depicted as wearing little else. Black briefs — sported with bare chests — were clearly intended as a symbol of roaring butchness.
This is practically the first time since - well, since briefs were invented, clearly around 3006c if we are to go with the film - that this style of underpant has received any good publicity. But it's true, briefs – or the boxer/brief hybrid - tight pants with legs – are back. Calvin Klein makes them. So does Marks. So does everyone, in fact, barring Agent Provocateur. They can be said to be suitable for most ages, from young lothario to pottering-in-the-shed middle-aged man. They are either white, or black, or grey. There are never any concerns about choices of other (unsuitable) colours, such as powder blue or canary yellow. If ever the trousers in a sitcom now shimmer to the protaganist's ankles, it is a 90 per cent certainty that the hapless chap will be wearing this genre of pant.
The old school purists have always argued that in aesthetic terms (and also comfort terms), it has to be the boxer short. In 1986, the argument found wider favour outside of posh circles after the jeans advert in which Nick Kamen removed his Levi's to reveal those very undercrackers. But of late, the reputation of the boxer has become sullied by the temptation on the part of manufacturers and wearers alike to go for novelty — logos, photos, tunes, emblazoned all over.
Indeed, in some ways, long-legged briefs could be regarded as the final word on the pant. They also might at least be said to be classless, as far as any form of nether-garment can be. They are snug. They are not skimpy. They have a certain quiet dignity. They don't produce the sort of recoil of a) revulsion or b) ridicule that most other men's pants across the years have done. And, most vitally, partners, on the whole, prefer them.
Sinclair McKay
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