Q. My parents own a house in Cornwall which they
normally rent out at New Year for a huge sum of money. This year they very kindly allowed me to have it and to invite ten friends from uni. It all went really well and everyone had a brilliant time. My problem is that although my guests all thanked me — mostly orally, in some cases by texting — I am worried that none of them will get round to thanking my parents in writing. It may not even occur to them to do so. How can I tactfully remind them to get on with these breadand-butter letters? My parents are oldfashioned about these things and my friends’ idleness would certainly impact on my opportunity to take the house again.
S.G., Exeter A. Do not bother being tactful. As soon as term begins, set up a reunion party. As the slackers stroll in, issue them with pen, paper and writing surfaces and explain that drinks will be served shortly but first you are going to do them a small favour. You want to be able to invite them to Cornwall again, so consequently you are going to make it easy for them to produce the requisite thank-you letters so difficult to get around to under one’s own steam but a doddle when classroom conditions are replicated. Stand over them, schoolmistress-style, while they eke out their two or three hundred words of gratitude. They will be only too pleased to take on this simple challenge with its delightful contrast to the brain strain of essay-writing. When bullying is billed as a form of life-coaching, co-operation comes easily and you will soon have generated an impressive postbag to reassure your parents.
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