22 DECEMBER 1990, Page 67

On the Christmas List

Like evolution the Christmas card list, no dramatic change, just the drop of a name or a change of places, a slight acquaintance upped to friend, a cast-off aunt or mother-in-Iaw's ex-lover tippexed to rest.

It's the survival of the fittest, of those whose warmth outlasts a year or two or three then sifts the heart's strata from limestone to silence. I knit the geology of love, add three, slip two — each Christmas it's the same, a list of names, a kind of christening.

Diana Hendry