SPECTATOR COMPETITIONS—No. 12

Report by Janus The usual prize or prizes were offered for the best discussion in not more than 200 words of thc affirmation "The Prince of Dark- ness is a Gentleman."

This competition produced less than the average number of entries. It is no doubt to the credit of reader& of the Spectator that their acquaintance with the devil should be slight. One entrant indeed (Miss P. A. Tarrant) began by explaining that "not being personally acquainted with the gentleman in question, I am forced to depend entirely on hearsay." Suffering from something of the same disability myself, I have some doubt of my capacity to judge this competition adequately. But it so happens that seven or eight entries stand out definitely above the rest, so that my task (formidable enough, even so) is limited to selecting two winners out of the seven or eight. Two send entries in verse, which ought not, after all, to surprise, since, as many competitors point out, two poets, Milton and Goethe, are our best authorities on the Prince of Darkness. Both versions have notable merits. G. K., paraphrasing in rhyme what R. H. Russell, among others, has said forcibly in prose, so sounds the warning:— "In Bohemia don't expect him ; Never found in East End brawl, Clear of night-club and pub-crawl ; No ; his favourite trail is laid On the highway of world-trade ; Shortage is his chief delight Cornering, selling at the height." R. Kennard Davis is rather more ambitious, favouring the ballade form and achieving marked success in it, in spite of an otiose second half of line six. I cannot deny him a prize, little as there is to choose between him and G. K., and his version will be found in full at the proper place. Of the prose entries, two have special characteristics, one, by N. Hodgson, being modelled on Sir Thomas Browne and one, by John Palmer, on Francis Bacon. In both their content and their ingenuity of form they are formidable rivals to the more orthodox twentieth-century versions. Among the latter I liked particularly that by Edward Samson, who works in neatly several current clichés in the assertion, "A courteous host, he welcomes all with warmth, and provides them with everlasting hospitality. They who once have met him for ever burn with enthusiasm in a company both entertaining and colourful. In life he relieves our monotony, finding work for idle hands—thus giving to each his purpose—and after justly rewards their labours. Nor need even the hindermost fear, for he will take them also." If one purpose of this competition is to throw light on the devil, E. Fitzgibbon must be held to contribute a good deal, for there is much that is illuminating in this characterisation: "Quiet in approach, soft of speech, persuasive in argument; sympathetic and agreeable ; acutely sensitive to the diseases and infirmities of those in need or temptation ; calm, dignified and polite ; an unfailing companion in adversity, adviser in perplexity and admirer in achievement ; and, finally, unswervingly true to his own principles, he is incorruptible." To which may be added Miss Dilys Williams's tribute: "As in his subtlety he is gentle and in his great strength he is manly, the Wince of Darkness well earns the title Gentleman." Curiously enough, no one, I think, has considered supping with the devil or holding a candle to him. How, then, is justice to be done ? I wish I knew. Ideally, no doubt, by awarding more prizes than I have at my disposal. After strenuous self-searching, and with proper misgivings, I think I had better divide the prize-money rather unusually, giving £2 as first prize and £1 10s. as two second prizes—for between Browne and Bacon I can make no fine distinction. Here, then, is the result: FIRST PRIZE

(MR. R. KENNARD DAVIS)

BALLADE OF THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS.

You find him in the most exalted places Standing, a pillar of polite society, At fashionable weddings, routs and races, Adept at cards, a patron of Variety.

Ladies, be warned ! Of pleasure, to satiety, He'd have you sip, from whence soe'er you can ; Little he reeks of middle-class propriety, The Prince of Darkness is a Gentleman ! Master is he of all the minor graces ; His manners show no hint of contrariety ; The enjoyment of the hour he ne'er defaces With ill-timed scruple or intrusive piety !

Each vulgar conscience-prick, each base anxiety He sweeps aside with suave imperious ban, —Until he has you damned beyond dubiety The Prince of Darkness is a Gentleman !

ENVOY Prinny, you gained an evil notoriety Ere with Victoria Virtue's reign began.

"First Gentleman in Europe " ? We deny it—aye,

The Prince of Darkness is a Gentleman !

SECOND PRIZE (bracketed)

(Mu. N. HODGSON) Fragment of MS entitled PHILODIABOWS, by Sir Thos. Browne, M.D.

. . . [I] confess that the Devil hath not received his Due. That the venerable Fathers and sundry worthy Divines discover no good parts in him concludeth not their non-existence. First, holy Scriptures (as even prejudicate Readers must allow) afford us a pregnant example of his excellent courtesie, in that he offer'd the Fruit not to Adam, the man, but to Eve, the woman. Second, whereas Aristotle, in his Pourtrait of the Gentleman, delivereth that such an one bath a high opinion of his aim deserts, and will not bow to another, so in Mr. Milton his Epick Satan saith: Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven. Third, it is commonly opinioned that a Gentleman will not use Force to gain his ends but persuasion; so the Devil compelleth us not to sin, but, through the frailtie of our own (Economic, he gently and by subtile circumven- tions, inveigles us. Fourth, he manifestly holdeth to his Promises and makes plain his Wages to those that serve him. Witness Dante, who over that Infernal Portal found this verse (with no Amphibology) inscribed: Lasciate ogui speranza, voi ch'entrate.

Fifth .. . [cetera desunt.]

SECOND PRIZE (bracketed)

(MR. JOHN PALMER)

(From the private diary of Francis Bacon) Concerning the Quality of Satan there hath been much disputation. His Descent repairs by Antiquity what it lacks in Nobility. His Learning is shewn, by his famous deep acquaintance with Holy Writ, from which he is ever ready to support argument with apt quotation ; but he was nevertheless sent down from the oldest Seat of Knowledge. Unabashed by which discomfiture, he set up in a large establishment, and sheweth ready hospitality to all who may find his nature congeniaL, or have failed to obtain accommodation Elsewhere. Only in this doth he want some- what of the perfect host, that disregarding the proverb he speedeth not • the parting guest ; for none, 'tis said, once received into his house, can tear himself away. Satan hath then Family, Learning, Courage, this- pitality ; and also the fifth part of Gentility, which is Capability in affairs. This he sheweth in managing for so long so great an Estate ; and in the reports, that he is keen to make a compact with a man, and strict to observe its conditions. It is apparent, that the Prince of Darkness is a Gentleman—which observation I may introduce on some proper occasion.