THE HOAX OF THE M ONTH. —The wag who contributes this article
of mauvaise plaisanterie has an invention for absurdity which ap. pears inexhaustible. His style, too, is as surprising as his fancy; witness the following exquisite morceau.— " Some waistcoats are now in preparation, which are remarkably rich and elegant. Having no kind of monotony, nothing fixed in either of the pat.. terns or shades, they bear the application of waistcoats for every season. On one is seen a barbel, on the other a lily, of the valley, a rose, a scarlet-corn. poppy, a tulip, a heartsease, a daisy, and two butterflies of South America. it is, without doubt, in the sole desire of giving pleasure, that such fashions have been invented ; for our beaux will wear such an assortment on their bosoms which will compel them to adopt a cause of gallantry towards the fair who may study botany by the patterns on their waistcoats."
How nicely that logic is stitched together, and how beautifully the tailor's loose at once warms and smooths the composition. The fashion invented with the sole desire of giving pleasure, as the song says,—
" Pon my word 'tis very funny, Not a thought about the money."
And then the cause,—" for our beaux will wear such an assort- ment which will compel them to adopt a cause of gallantry towards the fair." What mortal indeed with a barbel, a corn-poppy, a daisy figured on his waistcoat, can resist the impulse of those sprigs to gai. lantry. And lastly, how exquisite the idea of the ladies studying botany on the gentlemen's waistcoats ! We beg to add, however, that " some men of fashion," who prefer giving lessons in natural history, have donkies, geese, and buzzards on their waistcoats. A gentleman was seen too at Bartholemy Fair, with a head of Napoleon on his pocket-handkerchief; whence some ladies in his company studied the art of war to such a degree, that they were captivated by the watch for practical examples of proficiency. These patterns are preferred to the " barbels, butterflies," and other botanical productions, because an ugly joke was made some short time ago apropos of a weed. The author of a novel called Granby raged once on a time as a lion about town ; and a person having objected that he had done nothing of a magnitude to entitle him to that distinction, it was answered, "Aye, very true, but you will observe he is only a dandy-lion."
We proceed with our wonder of wonders :- " At a ball in the country, two or three dancers wore very remarkable kind of shoes which had neither buckles or strings, but were like women's shoes, though cut rather rounder on the instep."
. At a ball in the country, during the hay-making season, some ladies, on the other hand, were observed in good, solid, substantial, clouted, men's shoes, handsomely studded with nails all round the soles ; which made a pleasing noise, keeping time with the music like castanets, or perhaps more closely resembling the clatter of a smith's anvil.
" Some men of fashion, it is said, have actually been seen at evening parties with half-boots of satin, made exactly like those worn by females.
" Gentlemen have now two sorts of visiting-cards. When a man of fashion wishes any one to know he has left his card, his name is written with a pencil on a square piece of plain vellum. An engraved card is sent by a footman.
"An exquisite wears his clothes so tight, that custom permits him to loosen the buckles of his waistcoat and pantaloons before he sits down to table."
At some places custom permits him to pull them off altogether. We saw a man of fashion, the other day, dining at a fete champitre, under a hedge, without either his coat, waistcoat, or smockfrock, and his neckkerchief was spread out as a tablecloth for the bread and bacon.
" An exquisite wears sometimes on the fore-finger of the right hand, a gold ring enamelled with black, which fills up the space from one joint to the other. On the fourth finger of the left hand, there are so many rings that the finger cannot be bent." Thus we may know the genuine exquisite by the unbend4character of his sinister fourth finger. There is a sign also for the detection of counterfeits.
" Some pretended fashionables have their shirts made of Indiau taffety." We shall keep a look-out for taffety, and, as Lady MORGAN would say, weed our acquaintance accordingly.
Previous page
