Q. I am the father of four-year-old twins. Since their
birth, I have been asked by friends, acquaintances and complete strangers (in the street!) if they were conceived by IVF. As it happens, they were conceived naturally, but! am uncomfortable about discussing the subject because (a) it is personal and (b) I feel as though a truthful answer might sound like a criticism of parents who have used IVF (as one of my relatives has). Evasion is taken as an admission. How should !respond?
Name and address withheld A. Why not pull them up sharp by fixing them with a sympathetic stare and inquiring kindly, 'Why do you ask? Are you undergoing IVF yourself?' Before they have the chance to reply, cut in with, 'Sorry, don't answer that intrusive question. Why should you tell me about something so private and special? Forgive me. I don't know why I asked you. I'm sure you wish now that you
hadn't asked me.' Mary Killen
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