High life
Fish to fry
Taki
0 h dear. It promises to be one hell of a fight, with multi-billionaire Sid Bass on one side versus Women's Wear Daily, the Bible of those who'd rather shop than eat, on the other. The reason? The Bible of anorexia recently revealed that Mercedes Bass, wife of Sid, spent 75 million green- backs on furniture from Louisland, this at a time when the recession is biting not only the homeless but also a few who knew Mercedes long before she married a Texan with a name of a fish.
Adding the proverbial fuel to the fire are Michael Thomas, a columnist on the New York Observer, and my close buddy Christo- pher Buckley, writing in the Tina Brown, aka the New Yorker. Oh yes, I almost for- got, the poor little Greek boy also took a swipe at Mercedes, but not for the same reasons as my colleagues. Let me explain.
I did not agree with WWD's shock horror
at Mercedes's extravagance simply because I truly believe that if the rich don't spend it, who will? If rich old bags don't buy over- priced clothes from gay designers, how will the latter afford their houses, yachts and toy boys? And if the nouveaux riches don't buy furniture in order to impress their bet- ters, how will antique and art dealers pay their bills in the five-star hotels around the world where they ply their trade? No, money needs to circulate, and it would not if there were no people like the Basses around. Mercedes is right in flaunting it.
Mind you, I admit that Mercedes is fol- lowing in the tradition of rich Americans by shopping for culture and filling up her drawing-room with things that have as much to do with her family as Bill Clinton has to do with valour in combat. Her prob- lem is that she now takes herself extremely seriously. I knew her as Mercedes Tavacoli, a funny-looking Iranian woman with a ready smile, back during the Sixties in Geneva. She then married Francis Kellogg, a gentleman much older than herself, a diplomat who, alas, was not of the cereal family. He introduced her to Big Bagel café society, and even took her to Blenheim on one of those paid-for shindigs Americans don't mind shelling out for in order to rub shoulders with what they perceive as their betters. That is when she met Sid Bass, and it was love at first count.
If what I hear is true, that she vets party lists before she answers an invitation, it means there's something awfully fishy going on in society in general, and fish soci- ety in particular. She obviously has not got the message that the grander the dame, the humbler the manner.
Needless to say, Sid Bass, reputed to be madly in love, is not going to take attacks on his wife by turning the other cheek. Instead of being flattered that the Persian is being compared to Marie Antoinette and Madame de Pompadour, he is doing an Orlando Furioso, with a Texan accent. But John Fairchild, the Fiihrer of fashion vic- tims, is not easily intimidated. Nor are Michael Thomas and Chris Buckley.
And as for the poor little HeIlene, I can only quote Donald Regan, after the egre- gious Nancy Reagan had him fired as presi- dential chief of staff for misplacing one of Jerry Zipkin's dresses. When asked what he would do now that he had lost his job he said, 'Gentlemen of the press, don't worry about me. I've got f— you money.' I say amen. After health, f— you money is all- important, and that's what I plan as my defence if and when the fishy types go after the greatest Greek writer since Homer.
said, "It's a bit blowy today".'
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