High life
Snags
Taki
To say that I've hit a snag in the pursuit of the high life would be an understate- ment. The morbid fascination with self- destruction has also come to a halt. Sud- denly one wants serenity and balance but both are for the moment inaccessible. After three weeks of ups and downs, it has suddenly dawned on me that things will never be the same again. Well, the only thing that makes it easier for me to bear the public humiliation is the fact that I have no one to blame but myself. In my expel!' ence there are those who express their impotence in aggression, and there are others who convey it through self- denigration. Throughout my life I've al- ways been aggressive when down. This time, although I can't bear self-loathing, am not about to go around celebrating and hitting people. Some of my friends think that the literary flame might be kindled by all this, but I doubt it. I need to be arrogant to be good, and I ain't feeling arrogant right now. What I am feeling is humble, with a little help from Customs and Excise, of course. What I find interesting, however, is the fact that living recklessly in the fast lane does not necessarily mean that when one crashes one's troubles are over. More often than not one is maimed for life, and spends the rest of one's life regretting. The best
examples I know are my two maternal uncles. One of them was the most brilliant lawyer in Greece, but by the age of 30 he was paralysed from his neck down, and today, 40 years later, he is a shell of a man, bedridden for 40 years all because of one moment of folly. A German officer had bet him he wouldn't jump from a particular cliff which was just not high enough for a Parachute to open. My uncle Nicholas took him up oh it as if national honour was at stake.
My other uncle was even crazier. When he was 12 years old he wrote Mussolini a letter and got himself invited as the Duce's guest to Villa Borghese for one month. When the Italo-Greek war broke out he distinguished himself by being awarded the highest decoration Greece had to offer. Throughout four years of German occupa-
tion he fought in the mountains, and then continued to fight the communists until the civil war was over. He was extremely
good-looking and probably the randiest Man in that randiest of countries. He was also always in love. When peace came he got bored. When a fellow officer went after his girl he challenged him to a game of Russian roulette — and lost.
Well, if it sounds pretty useless, it was. But there is some consolation. I don't think my uncle Taki would have liked the
Present world, so maybe he knew some- thing the rest of us don't. Yes, I guess one
Moment of impulse can change one's life for ever. Take, the case of another friend of
?line, Pierre Mairesse Le Brun. It was in k`968 and the soi disant students had brought Paris to a halt. All sporting events Were called off in case it made the ruling Class look as if it were amusing itself. Even the polo was called off, which made all of us extremely angry with the students as well as the gutless people who ran the polo. In order to retaliate we had a large party at ,the polo club and with black tie, and very
'junk, drew up sides for a moonlit game. Pierre Mairesse, who had been a cavalry officer and had been wounded badly dur-
ing the war, asked to be tied on his horse, ,and sure enough he was (he was too drunk cm stay on otherwise). The game was fun for a while, with people falling off and girls tfunning on the field, until Pierre's horse ell and rolled over him. He broke his neck and has been partly paralysed ever since. I was among those who had had the brilliant Idea to have the game, and perhaps one of the reasons I stopped polo and Paris soon after was because of that night. (1968 was a 'torrid year. One week later, in a practice match, Elie de Rothschild lost his eye when a ball struck him.)
I've had a lot of time to think back these Past three weeks, and I must admit I've
vv?dged my share of bullets. In fact, last inlitter my wife threw out a handgun I kept New York when, drunk one night, I stayed challenging another clown who had ,s.aYed up with me. Just as well too. With giY luck I probably would have missed myself, hit him and been charged with inUtder.
Previous page
