MARGINAL COMMENT
By HAROLD NICOLSON
THE microphone is a misleading instrument, since it fattens and thereby softens the human voice, and in so doing distorts character. In the days when I used frequently to broadcast I became perplexed and disconcerted by the letters I received. I had always looked upon myself as a caustic sort of chap, and upon my voice as being both rapid and shrill. And then the postcards started coming in. " Why be so slow about it? " one listener asked, " there is no .need for you to speak at dictation-speed." " Cannot you speak a little higher? " another listener wrote, " I loathe these deep bass sounds." Being disturbed by these remarks I had a record taken of one of my talks and sat .there while they played it over to me. I had foreseen that my own voice would sound strange to me, but I imagined that it would at least possess " l'inflexion des voix cheres gut se sons tues." Not at all. In place of the native wood-notes wild which I had always supposed to represent my tone of voice, I was startled by sounds which were ponderous, asthmatic and at the same time as glutinous as the crude oil which I had seen oozing up from the installations of the Anglo-Persian Oil Company in Iran. But there was worse to come. Everybody has his particular form of nightmare ; my own is to be assailed suddenly by hiccups when in the middle of a broadcast talk. Although not prone to this particular disability, I was careful, when about to broadcast, to eschew all extreme forms of drink or food ; barley water and an omelette was my supper on those evenings when, at 9.15 p.m., I was due to face the microphone. It was thus with pain and surprise that I dis- covered that to many unknown people I conveyed the impression of being in the final stages of intoxication. I admit that I have an un-nimble tongue and that such words as " irreligious " or " irre- sponsible " are apt at the best of moments to become a trifle slurred. But it was only when the postcards assumed an advisory capacity that I realised how false and cruel an impression this indolent habit might convey. " What about a little less port next time? " one anonymous writer counselled me. The Member for Aberdeen and Kincardine East received a letter from a constituent deploring the fact that inebriated persons should be allowed the freedom of the air ; Mr. Boothby passed the letter on to me with glee. * * * *
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